Eliyzabeth Yanne Strong-Anderson #fundie

Eliyzabeth Yanne Strong-Anderson #fundie amazon.com

THIS IS A HOLYSPIRIT MANUSCRIPT BOOK: WHEN YOU BUY THIS BOOK YOU WILL BE READING A HOLYSPIRIT DIRECTED BOOK FROM GOD; & *CHRIST JESUS. THIS BOOK IS GODS HOLYSPIRIT VOICE: THE CALL FOR ALL CHRISTIANS & CHURCHES TO REPENT FROM ALL THEIR SINS: EVEN FROM FALSE CHRIST TEACHINGS. BIRTH CONTROL SINS HAVE CURSE THE CHURCH WITH SPIRITUAL WHOREDOM & FALSE WORSHIP. RESULTING IN THE PERSECUTIONS: AGAINST THE HOLY PEOPLE. THIS BOOK MAY BE REVISED: BECAUSE OF COMPUTER DICTATORS: MANY WORDS IN THIS BOOK: MADE HAVE BEEN CHANGED: TO>>DISCREDIT: THE AUTHOR. BUT IN TRUTH: I AM A HOLYSPIRIT CHOSEN ANOINTED DISCIPLE FOR GOD & CHRIST JESUS. EVEN FOR JEWS, MUSLIMS & GENTILE SINNERS. MANY PEOPLE WILL LEARN HOW TO> BECOME REAL BORN AGAIN CHRISTIAN: THROUGH THIS HOLYSPIRIT BOOK & THROUGH THE PROTECTION & SUPPORT OF MY HOLYSPIRIT LIFE!! JOHN 3 & 15. ALL NATIONS WILL OVER COME THE SINS OF BIRTH CONTROL. *BECAUSE HOLY DOMINIONSHIP IS ONE OF THE FIRST COMMANDMENT IN GENESIS 1;26-31. ALL BELIEVERS: WILL COME TO A HOLY VOW OF REPENTANCE: THROUGH GODS RESTORATION & THROUGH GODS ADOPTION VOWS. YES!! THE KINGDOM OF GOD & HEAVEN!! IS AT HAND!! FOR ALL WHO BELIEVE IN THE ONE CREATOR GOD & CHRIST JESUS OUR HOLYSPIRIT ETERNAL LIFE SAVIOR: SURELY YOUR NAMES WILL BE WRITTEN IN THE LAMBS BOOK OF LIFE!! *WHEN YOU SUPPORT & PROTECT MY HOLYSPIRIT LIFE. WE ARE BRANCHES >JOHN 15 MY WEBSITE: http://groups.msn.com/ChristianPowerHealthProsperityAndSoulREMEMBER: GOD HAS MADE ME A HOLYSPIRIT VOICE FOR THE BRIDE OF GOD & CHRIST JESUS IN 1996 GOD TOLD ME TO TEACH THE GOSPEL ON CABLE TELEVISION IN TUCSON ARIZONA. *CONCERNING THE SINS OF THE CHURCHES: & CONCERNING THE>LACK OF GIVING TO THE POOR & ORPHANS: CHRISTIAN CHURCHES SHOULD: BUILD MORE:> WATER WELLS: & BUILD LOW INCOME HOUSINGS: MATTHEW 25 & ISAIAH 61

29 comments

old comment by dxdydz

This is awesome. Be sure to read through the reviews!

"I'm sorry, I thought this was a book about birth control and Jesus, but it appears to be written in FORTRAN." - Ronald J. Conlon

"The haters here are "gonna hate," but you should know that this new edition, all caps and excessive punctuation aside, is WAY better than the first edition of the book, which was written entirely in human excrement on the interior walls of the Athens Lunatic Asylum in Athens, Ohio. So let's give a little credit where credit is due, guys." - avid reader

"IF YOU ARE LIKE ME AND HATE THE WRITERS WHO MAKE THE WORDS IN SENTENCES THAT MAKE THE SENSE, YOU WILL BUY THIS BOOK BY DROVES. I SPECIALLY LIKED THE SIZE OF ALL THE LETTERS ON THE PAGES THAT MAKES LOOK LIKE WORDS IN THE BIG GROUPINGS. I HAD NO PROBLEM PAYING THE MONEY OF $140.11 BECAUSE I DON'T UNDERSTAND MATH TWO WELL." - Jordan Eckerling

And on the suggested book [i]Does God Ever Speak through Cats?[/i]:

"My neighbor's cat once looked me dead in the eye and began to telepathically dictate a lost chapter of the Book of Revelations to me. He explained that he was the angel Gabriel (in cat form), and God had chosen me as his prophet. I tried to write it down, but couldn't figure out how to use a pencil at the time (I'd had a lot of acid earlier that day. Also some Vicodin, opium, and a handful large orange pills).

Obviously, some of my unusual experiences that day could have been related to the drugs, but the cat part was definitely from God." - Ryan H

old comment by Creedence Leonore Gielgud

@dxdydz
>"I'm sorry, I thought this was a book about birth control and Jesus, but it appears to be written in FORTRAN." - Ronald J. Conlon

This reminded me of someone:

And therefore of something:

Eliyzabeth and Terry seem to be a match made in Heaven, literally. She writes "HOLYSPIRIT DIRECTED BOOK FROM GOD; & *CHRIST JESUS," and Terry has created an OS that is a temple for interacting directly with God, just as God instructed him to do. It's the Third Temple, according to Terry. Terry of course shares her concerns about "COMPUTER DICTATORS," whom he has maybe probably correctly identified as being none other than the CIA, whom are space aliens. TempleOS unfortunately doesn't come with any desktop publishing software, nor is there any third party support at all, because no third party has ever looked at TempleOS and done anything other than laugh themselves to tears, but that's ok, something tells me you don't write A HOLYSPIRIT MANUSCRIPT BOOK on anything more than Notepad, because LaTeX is too complicated (and also rubbers are made from latex which would be like wrapping God's word in one), and so is LibreOffice. She'd feel right at home in TempleOS, and she and Terry would be bffs...

...Oh yea, in addition to being a diagnosed schizophrenic, Terry is a bit of a racist and a homophobe too.

old comment by Salami

I was considering buying a used copy of the book for laughs, but then I saw the price tag. This tome of eldritch lore costs $136.00 for a new paperback and $50 used! Holyspirit! I know of textbooks that cost less than that!

Luckily (or perhaps unluckily), you can gaze into the madness with the page preview function, which shows you a good deal of the book. And ohhh boy, its even more incoherant than what you see here. Heck, just look at the chapter page:

The formatting is a mess! The grammar is an English teacher's nightmare! And the names only convey a vague idea of what the chapters are about!

I'll have to look into what else its publisher, AuthorHouse, is putting out. I get vanity press vibes from this-- which should be obvious because no legitimate, trustworthy publisher would accept a manuscript like this. But the publisher might have some other works of interest, so to speak.

old comment by Salami

@Psycho Tits

AuthorHouse is apparently a self-publishing company with policies reminiscent of a vanity press-- which translates to having pretty much no standards for what's published so long as authors pay them. And the lowest prices package that the website offers that would make sense for this book is $899.00. My guess is that either Eliyzabeth didn't anticipate a lot of people buying this book or she has a very bad sense of what makes for a good cost-to-price ratio (which is very common for people with no experience running a business). As for why anybody would buy it, well, I certainly know of some fundies crazy enough to buy something like this, or even buy multiple to hand out as tracts. Or non-Christians with cash to kill looking for a laugh.

I read that review. I'm still laughing. Dear god, the poor reviewer's Kindle's text to speech program couldn't comprehend the true form of the HOLYSPIRIT MANUSCRIPT BOOK. It really is a tome of eldritch lore!

@Jamaican Castle

To be fair, I have seen books that used the long chapter short chapter format effectively. For example, a lot of science and history books have chapters that cover something that's undeniably important to the subject of the book but that don't require as many pages as the other chapters to get it across in an understandable way. In fiction, it can also be used to emphasize shock at an unexpected event that occurred in the chapter, or for a time lapse.

However, I somehow doubt that this is one of the books that uses that format correctly...

Is that SHOUTY MABEL when she was young!?!?!?