Damian #fundie

Damian #fundie theresistancemanifesto.com

Gee, what a coincidence, I lost my virginity to rape too!
It was my first time getting drunk, and I wanted just that,
getting drunk, then she raped me. Women aren't the only ones who
can get raped, men can get it too, the only thing is,
men don't go crying around about it.

62 comments

old comment by Matilde

Your story is an argumentum ad absurdum. Men don´t get raped that way because:
a)when a man is drunk or an unwilling participant is bloody difficult to get an erection. b)women don´t work that way towards sex. They can get pregnant and contract a STD, and bearing in mind that the guy is not likely to wear protection, they don´t do that. c)They go screaming for those reasons that I have signalled above. Women can have a tougher burden than men, when sex comes. In any case, go screaming about it means exactly that they´re reclaiming justice. Men don´t do, because what you have stated is not rape. What happens is that, more often than not, both are drunk. Besides, rape is considered when the other participant is SOBER. That´s the difference.

old comment by Jenna

"IF you are raped, and don't have the dignity to get angry about it, fuck you."
TB, that's really fucking offensive. You'd never say that to a woman, or I devoutly hope you wouldn't. It's not a matter of dignity; rape strips a person of dignity and one of the many ways that people try to reclaim their dignity is through denial. That goes double for guys, who are led to believe that no man ever gets raped and they're automatically feminized by such an experience. I can't believe you'd acknowledge that it's possible this guy was raped and then say something like that. It's really fucking ugly when people tell other people what a "proper" response to rape looks like, no matter what that person's sex is or how abrasively they're behaving. The only objectionable thing in this guy's response is his attempt to invalidate other survivor's experiences, but that isn't what you were on about. I know this is FSTDT so everyone is ready to hate anyone who shows up here, but start thinking for yourselves rather than having reflex reactions for a change.

old comment by Jenna

And... I'm back. Reading through the comments...
"Your story is an argumentum ad absurdum. Men don´t get raped that way because: a)when a man is drunk or an unwilling participant is bloody difficult to get an erection." -Not true. Stress can cause erections, for one thing. For another, physical stimulation is physical stimulation. "b)women don´t work that way towards sex. They can get pregnant and contract a STD, and bearing in mind that the guy is not likely to wear protection, they don´t do that." -Bull. First of all, it's easy enough to put a condom on a drunk guy; second of all, if all women were as careful about protection as you're presupposing, no one would ever get pregnant by accident or get an STI. c)They go screaming for those reasons that I have signalled above. Women can have a tougher burden than men, when sex comes. -ABSOLUTELY untrue. NO ONE believes a man when he says he's been raped. Misconceptions like yours are absolutely rampant in our society. Women have a hell of a hard time getting people to believe they've been raped, but it's damn near impossible for a man to convince anyone he's been raped by a woman. Besides, rape is considered when the other participant is SOBER. -Untrue. Having sex with a drunk person is rape if they're drunk enough that they can't give consent. It makes absolutely no difference if the perpetrator has been drinking. Before anyone tells me I don't know what I'm talking about, I've worked at a rape crisis center for two years and have taken a particular interest in this subject. I've talked with guys who've been raped, I've heard them talk about exactly these misconceptions and how they make processing what happened immeasurably more difficult. I doubt anyone I'm responding to will listen, people do get defensive, but I really hope someone will. This is one of the issues I'm most passionate about.

old comment by The Bob

to everyone saying men can't be raped:
yes, yes we can. I was raped by a female - she drugged my beer with the sole purpose to have sex with me, me being a completely unwilling partner due to who she was, and there was no way in hell that I would have had sex with her if she hadn't drugged me. (think best friend, followed by wife.) the bitch of it is, she turned around and said that I raped HER. and you know what? a lot of people believed her, simply because she has a vagina, and I have a penis. she did finally come clean about the whole thing though - almost 6 years later. think about it really, it is not that difficult to arouse a man. so saying "if a man doesn't want sex he can't get hard" is just pure bullshit.

old comment by JD

If the guy's unconcious or barely concious he might not even be aware enough to resist, at which point our little buddy's more than happy to have fun at our expense. Haven't you ever woken up with your wife or girlfriend screwing you? most of us would never consider THAT situation to be rape (as opposed to "a really good way to wake up") but
There's aphrodisiacs that can do the trick, and even if you REALLY, REALLY don't want to, enough stimulation can get it hard eventually. Its tougher, but quite possible. Men CAN be raped too, and not just by other men. Just that under most circumstances we're a lot more likely to be willing than not (having less to worry about after all). Still, no means no, no matter your gender.

Damian #fundie theresistancemanifesto.com

62 comments

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