Ray Martinez #fundie

Ray Martinez #fundie scienceblogs.com

["So anyway, Ray, I'm curious how you explain the....decrease in violent crime and warfare as Europe has become increasingly secular."]

Assuming your fact is true, we explain decrease in violence and the increase of secular worldviews, in Europe, to support the agenda of Satan as revealed in the Bible.

When the Bible and Christianity are abandoned, which is the only goal and agenda of Satan, he leaves that nation, city, person alone. To embrace secularism is to make peace with Satan. When this occurs the devil ceases to attack (incite violence in this case).

What's your explanation?

88 comments

old comment by David B.

[Meanwhile, in a parallel universe...]

"So anyway, Ray, I'm curious how you explain the [...] increase in violent crime and warfare as Europe has become increasingly secular."

Assuming your fact is true, we explain increase in violence and the increase of secular worldviews, in Europe, to support the agenda of Satan as revealed in the Bible.

When the Bible and Christianity are abandoned, which is the primary goal and agenda of Satan, he infests that nation, city, person entirely. To embrace secularism is to embrace Satan. When this occurs the devil is free to attack (incite violence in this case).

What's your explanation?

[...we now return you to your regular universe.]

old comment by John

Fundie Beliefs #11 - The Value of Belief

Belief is not always rewarded on earth. Satan tests believers by punishing them with stuff like sex, drugs and money; whereas God tests believers by giving them cancer, having their children raped, and destroying whole cities with volcanoes and earthquakes. God does, however, occasionally reward belief. For example, suppose a good fundamentalist and an atheist both get their legs blown off in a war. For the believer, it’s obviously a reward: God has stepped in and saved him from death. For the atheist, it’s equally obvious that God has taken his legs as a punishment for his disbelief.

Failure to believe can have far-reaching consequences. God hates non-believers, of course, but He often strikes godly people just for standing nearby*. Going to the same school, or living in the same town or even the same country as a non-believer can attract God’s wrath and turn Satan loose on a rampage of letting people actually have fun. That’s why it’s important to phone death threats, kill their dogs and burn crosses on the lawns of atheists and beat up gays and tie them to fence posts to freeze to death so God knows you’re on His team and not theirs and tests your faith by sending the tornado to your town.

* The blasphemous suggestion that God is nearsighted is ridiculous.

old comment by DavidS

Well this adds to the fun, doesn’t it? So, the essential goal of the Christian is to get into heaven, which, he does simply by being a Christian (accepting Jesus as saviour). How one behaves, as we know, is irrelevant as doing good works and being non-Christian will not get you into heaven. Violent crime and warfare, we now learn, is instigated by Satan. People who turn away from the Bible and Christ are peaceful people because Satan leaves them alone. So, Satan entices Christians to commit violent crimes and go to war which they readily do because they want to get into heaven. They of course have a choice these Christians, to give up their Christianity for the sake of peace and not get into heaven or commit the violent crimes and murder and get into heaven. Thus, Christians are selfish pricks.

old comment by Pule Thamex

Where Bible God abides, there you'll find a proliferation of bigotry and violence. Wherever the Holy Hoverer, the Celestial Bomber Himself, Lord Bible God the rabid monster, wherever He flies, death and murder will not be far behind, hanging on to His tails like petulant and puritanical imps. It is said that if a sufficiently large number of drooling zombies let Him in to their heads then He will reward them by causing death and destruction to spread o'er their land.

The Savage Demon of the Air Ways has as His ultimate aim the creating of an eternal empire of ignorance and despair. He fully intends to establish His Hell on Earth so that the living and the dead shall enjoy no reprieve from excruciating torture.

Truth to tell, Bible God is mentally unwell. The only known treatment for a lunatic deity like Bible God is mockery. He has no defense against mockery and when mocked He tends to drift away to bother drooling zombies in some other place. It seems that He's done that with Europe. Thankfully, His visits here are less frequent these days.

old comment by lisamariefan

I've said it once before, and I'll say it again. Christianity can be summed up as god being responsible for everything,but to blame for nothing. There is such blind reverence these people have towards their deity that he can literally by definition do nothing wrong, and if they need to explain something, they'll automatically blame man or "Satan" or some shit. I mean, this isn't really something blame worthy, but I'm using that term because in order to "protect" the reputation of his god, Ray has to go and spin it as a narrative of "Satan giving less of a fuck" because he supposedly won.

Fundies, I tell you. They always take the gold when it comes to mental gymnastics.

old comment by Professor M

@ farpadokly --

to broker a deal with Satan when we go enmasse to Hell, as a pretext for an eventual overthrow of him and his minions

I seem to remember an old radio show where an unnamed Senator (Joe McCarthy in all but name) dies and goes to Heaven, where he starts up his new version of a Red Scare. Anyone determined to be a Communist or Communist sympathizer is sent to "down there", where a number of them (Jefferson, Lincoln, and everyone ever born with the name Karl Marx) start a revolution.

Or maybe Hal Duncan's Escape from Hell! (which is to have two increasingly-exclamatory sequels, Assault! On Heaven! and Battle! For the Planet! Of the Dead!).

old comment by Anon-e-moose

["So anyway, Ray, I'm curious how you explain the....decrease in violent crime and warfare as Europe has become increasingly secular."]

"Assuming your fact is true, we explain decrease in violence and the increase of secular worldviews, in Europe, to support the agenda of Satan as revealed in the Bible.

What's your explanation?"

image

You've just answered your own question, cuntbrain.

And as proven in the Bible - right from the start no less - Satan is in fact the good guy in all this, and your so-called 'God of Love' is actually infinitely worse than Cthulhu.

Then you wonder why the likes of the Invisible Pink Unicorn, JR 'Bob' Dobbs, Ceiling Cat, Raptor Jesus, Haruhi Suzumiya and His Noodlyness the Flying Spaghetti Monster exist, Ray?!

old comment by Professor M

@ Anon --

so Satan is pro peace?
All hail satan then?

There's a whole trope in the "literalist" Rapturite crowd about how the Antichrist will deceive people by feeding the poor, spreading love, and just generally acting like Jesus. With this in mind, they've concluded that anyone who feeds the poor, helps those who are suffering, and displays anything like love for humanity must be under suspicion as a potential Antichrist. Good Christians, then, must do all they can to avoid the example of Jesus by starting wars, screaming hate, screwing over the poor, and howling vitriol at anyone who will listen -- because this proves that they aren't the Antichrist.

Ray Martinez #fundie scienceblogs.com

88 comments

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