The unicorn in? the Bible is a single horned dinosaur. You see, dinosaurs coexisted with man.
35 comments
Wait, what? A mythical creature mentioned in a book of myths is proof that an unrelated actual creature existed alongside man?
So the absence of unicorn fossils doesn't prove they didn't exist despite no real evidence for their existence outside myths, but the absence of a transition fossil between reptiles and mammals is sufficient proof that Darwin was wrong despite a mountain of other evidence? Be consistent, for crissake! Don't just decide what you want to believe first and support only things that agree with you.
Also, the Bible says nothing about unicorns. It mentions the "re'em", which the septuagint translators translated as "monokerutos" (one-horned). The KJV translated it as "unicorn", but later translators translated it as "wild ox".
Quick quiz: Which is the most likely unicorn candidate?
(A) This animal...image remotely close to human remains, and has never been recognizably portrayed in ancient human art, story, legend or song, in any capacity...
or:
(B) THIS animal...image still exists alive today?
You have five minutes. No peeking.
Wait, why isn't it just a unicorn? Because there's never been any scientific evidence of such creatures, but there's plenty of evidence of dinosaurs...? OK. Makes sense... But the plenty of evidence that dinosaurs died several million years before homo anythingus appeared...?
I guess picking and choosing applies to science *and* the Bible, now. Huzzah! Equality!
Well Øyvind, I think it's actually 2 separate thoughts. The original question was probably something about unicorns and NephilimFree didn't know what book they were from. He then moves on to point out exactly what the Bible is. And since the Bible is a dinosaur, clearly dinosaurs DO coexist with man.
NephilimFree is a NOT a True Christian! If the Bible says there were unicorns it means unicorns! True Believers don't listen to this wolf in sheep's clothing.
Forgive me, but to think that we could have co-existed with dinosaurs is just silly by sheer logistics. We're slow. We're weak. We have poor senses. Really all we have going for us is intelligence. I'm sorry, but for a fair few dinosaurs, a human would be little more than a midmorning snack.
Hi. Just to let you know, unicorns did exist at one time. But they are not as you would imagine them, as cute ponies with horns, sometimes with wings, in various beautiful colors. They were destructive and cruel, with horns that fired lasers of death, annihilating anything in the beam. Their heads were skulls, with flaming eyes, and toxic breath. Blood from their impaled victims ran down from their horn, dyeing their skin and hair various sick shades of red and purple.
The wolves had to free the world from the oppression of the unicorn, as their soft fur was the only material that could resist the horn lasers. It wasn't much, because they could still impale and fire, but at least it was something.
So the epic battle commenced, one unlike anything the Earth has ever seen, or will ever see again. It shook the very foundation of the earth, but a few brave wolves eventually emerged from the rubble, ready to rebuild a new world.
Like you, I have no proof to back this up, but the story is a whole hell of a lot cooler. So I win.
1) Unicorns don't exist. Even if they, by some chance, do, they sure don't hang out on Earth.
2) Crocodiles. Birds.
3) The Bible also says bats are birds and that it's sinful to eat shellfish. It's the worst guidebook ever written.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register . Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.
