When a real man hears that his nation is fighting a "war for oil," for example, he honors the manly leadership of his nation that has the balls to take manly action. The real man doesn't whine and kowtow to the milquetoast apologizers and ass kissers. A real man kicks ass, he doesn't kiss ass. A real man doesn't form gun thug gangs to kowtow to enforce feminist laws and work against men and families. When a real man learns that his neighbor has slapped his whiny bitch wife for adultery or disrespect, the real man shakes his neighbor's hand and honors him for having the balls to take manly action in control of his wife and family.
...
They are taking manly control of their families even if it means kicking the feminazi bitches to the curb instead of walking down an isle with one of them. They need manly leadership to retake control of our nation.
90 comments
This made me laugh out loud.
He thinks he's so MANLY. In fact, if he was half as MANLY as he thinks he is, he'd have Testosterone Poisoning, and I don't know if that's even a real thing (despite being a trope)
A Real Man stands up against that which is wrong, which includes depriving innocent people of dignity, bombing their homes, and taking away all they cherish in the name of riches - Namely, oil. An idiotic moron listens to his higher-up and believes and supports every word without questioning.
A Real Man would rescue his neighbour's wife. No matter how bad the "disrespect" she could have committed - Even if she was adulterous - He has no right to attack her. She also does not have the right to attack him, but since men tend to be stronger, the point is lost on this kind of meatheaded idiot, since he only understands respect through subjugation. However, he does have the right to dissolve the bond of marriage at any moment he chooses.
Also, what the hell is MANLY control?
If this isn't a joke then Who Framed Roger Rabbit must have been a documentary; a cartoon character exists in the real world.
Too bad it's an unlovable one that only serves as a backdrop for the touching aesop episode.
Real men like Bob will remain blissfully unaware of how repugnant they are until one day in their seventies, when they look back upon the life they've spent in jail for abusing women.
Tiny dick in hand. Not a woman in sight to comfort or love him in his old age.
On second thought...chances are, he still won't get why the babes just aren't digging him.
Bob goes to the doctor and says "Before I tell you what's wrong, you have to promise you won't laugh." The doctor swears by her Hippocratic oath she won't laugh. Bob drops his pants, and he is hung small . It's like a AAA battery. The doctor can't help herself, she laughs until she cries. Eventually she composes herself. "I'm sorry", she says. "That was unprofessional of me, Bob. So, tell me, what's the problem?"
Ah Bob, the old guy who is pro-woman beating, thinks dirty old men should all have thirteen year old slaves/brides, and insists that women should stop their bitching about rape and just enjoy the free sex. I have no idea why his wife left him, none at all.
Why doesn't Bob slap himself? According to his own words, the whiny bitch he is deserves it!
@The Knight of Piñata: Testosterone can be toxic for real, but I think a man suffering from literal testosterone poisoning would be too concerned about the physical symptoms to waste time waving his dick around. Hormone secreting tumors tend not to make their host happy after all...
This is from Bobs profile
"Gender Male
Consulting! Well he's just sooooo macho. If I was female I'd be all over him.
You're so scared women are going to dominate you so much that you childishly lash out at them like this, but you're the real man?
Yeah just keep telling yourself that, Bob.
I would say this is a poe, but then I remember Reddit and Spearhead and love-shy and I'm not sure anymore.
Goddammit, I hate the Internet.
@Kitourahime: i'm with Hertzyscowicz on this one. i'm sorry, but you've just insulted every male in the world by including bob in your "male criteria", cis and trans alike... hold on, now i'm insulting women by my twisted logic.
let's just say bob here is an insult to humankind, alright?
Gay porn isn't this gay...
"A real man kicks ass, he doesn't kiss ass."
Hitting another human being is a crime called battery. Killing the innocent citizens of another country for oil is a war crime. "Bob" strikes me as someone who, due to his inability to actually live in a civilized society, will end up being someone's bitch in a an overcrowded prison.
Hate to tell ya, Bob, but ya gotta have a real brain and a real dick to qualify as a real man. Ya ain't packing the right stuff, son.
A real man kicks ass, he doesn't kiss ass.
I guess that explains the worst 9/11 in history then, 9/11/1973 and the last 9/11, the New York kind. They were men too, they kicked ass, so I guess you must admire the terrorist for being manly!
I guess you plan to live your life alone, no real women will want to live with a brute like you.
The Nazis preferred the same kind of women you do; stay-at-home moms who have lots of little blond and blue-eyed babies who can grow up to become soldiers and stay-at-home moms.
A real man is not threatened by empowered women. A real man treats women with the respect owed to all human beings.
You "Bob", are a whiny insecure loser.
A real man kicks ass
image
Bob is a manly man.
In desperate need of a reach-around.
Because he is a manly man. BWAHHHAAAAA.
@checkmate - dude, things that can't be unseen!
Kent Brockman: Mm-mmm! Simpson, you're a master craftsman.
Read more tv spoilers at: http://www.tvfanatic.com/quotes/shows/the-simpsons/season-18/page-18.html#ixzz2DgZtYF4j
Real man blah blah manly leadership blah blah blah man blah manly blah blah manly action blah blah ass blah kiss ass blah manly control blah feminazi blah manly blah nation (go 'Murcia!)
I think he might have some manly confidence issues. Micropenis is quite an unfortunate condition. He should just get a big 4x4 like everyone else with tiny dicks. The internet need not be concerned.
I've got to let you guys in on this. This Bob faggot is a massive poster on the ultra anti-gay website created by an Aussie boy from our generation sadly (Gen Y; born in 1985) that condones the men's rights movement is doomed if they don't oppose the evil pedophile Gay Agenda that plans to indoctrinate kids as their little sex slaves and form a one world government rule by homosexuals to tax and enslave all the world's heterosexuals.http://forum.mens-rights.net
Chris Key (the owner Aussie boy) used to support gay rights until about 7 months ago after a "revelation" on the true nature of the gay community; in that all gays are sick freaks like a la Folsom Street fair.
Bob's username is bobx23456.
All of the users regularly condone the killing of gays, including a few incidents I remember of frying them up in a crematorium, the event of Australia's version of Laramie, WY gay killing by infamous John Bunting of gays screwing in public parks, siding and defending Fred Phelps, wishing death on "fag enablers", think 99% of homosexuals support NAMBLA.
On another topic of an equally retarded thought of Bob's, a discussion of the why's of autism, he said that Mother Nature took away social skills from autistics so they won't be distracted by socializing as they need to work hard on their next big genius discovery. Only problem with that, how will the autistic find a job without basic people skills?
C&C commando:
"REAL TOUGH GUY!"
@Reynardine, afacelessatheist
I just checked his older entries, and... Holy shit, he must have the smallest dick ever.
Also, on a scale of 1-10, how much do you think Bob browses Reddit?
I'm thinking around 8, personally, because I know how much misogynists fucking love that site, and he seems like a really typical angry, neckbearded Reddit MRA who's obsessed with "manliness" and thinks rape is a feminazi lie and blah blah grr wimminz maek rage. But on the other hand, he can't browse it constantly enough to be a 10 because that would take valuable time away from updating his own shitty blog, and from stewing about his inability to get a woman of any kind.
@Kitourahime: in "Bob's" world, a real man would only rescue his neighbor's battered wife if he wanted her for himself. Her health and well-being only matter insofar as they directly affect her desirability as his property, and her wants and needs shouldn't be considered at all. Likewise, Bob's "real manly men" think that anything you're powerful enough to take rightfully belongs to you, and see absolutely nothing wrong with the leaders of their nation going to war to take the resources of a weaker nation.
In other words, Bob here dreams of living on Gor. If he actually GOT his wish, he'd be dead within about a day through a combination of sheer ineptitude and fatal stupidity unless he was under the direct protection of someone much stronger than him...and most likely that person would put him in his place with the quickness the very first time he said or did something ridiculously stupid. I guarantee that he'd never survive in the society he apparently wants otherwise.
(Yeah, I read them when I was younger. Yeah, they're as bad as they sound, I had a lot more patience for time-wasting crap years ago. Yeah, I suck.)
You think your exalted qualities make you a "Real Man", Mr. Bob?
Marcus Fenix, Jack Rakan, Alex Louis Armstrong, Jorge-052, Zafira, The 4th Raikage, Tychus Findlay, and Chuck Norris would all like "a word" with you.
However, why doesn't he congratulate the manly man who breaks the balls of the one who hits his wife?. You know, logic is logic, whenever you look at.
@DKN117 and Evil Monkey:
I don't think Guy Shishioh, Sanger Zonvolt, and Bang Shishigami would approve either. (Sure, Bang hits girls, but it's a fighting game. Everyone hits everyone.)
My weight training instructor is the single manliest person I have ever seen in my life--bench presses 300, bicep curls 40, could probably do push-ups all day and night, could easily kick your sorry butt any day of the week--and yet he got angry at a weight training student who used the word "chick" in reference to a woman. I can only imagine what his reaction would have been had the kid said "bitch" instead.
Aaaaaand... when the oil runs out...?
You going to kick ass at General Motors to wrest away from them their prototype Hy-Wire car, powered by fuel cells that run on hydrogen?
How long will you try, before the GM staff call the real men - the police - who enforce those 'feminist laws' and take control of you via their manly leadership?
You're gonna be whining like a pussywhipped bitch to the (hopefully) female judge to maybe show leniency.
Maybe.
A *real* man treats a woman with respect as an equal, a friend and the mother of our race...and likewise a real woman with a man--friend, equal and father of our race. "People" (and I use that word loosely) like Bob can go and suck it!
>> A real man doesn't form gun thug gangs to kowtow to enforce feminist laws and work against men and families.<< He joins supports gun thug gangs who go to the countries that have our oil and kill the brown squatters that are keeping our SUVs off the road. Harrumphh!
Ooorahh!
Our sponsor would like to have a word with you, Bob. Torgue?
"NOTHING IS MORE BADASS THAN TREATING A WOMAN WITH RESPECT!"
Thanks!
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register . Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.
