LOL ITG.
So this racist idiot came up to me and spouted off some bullshit, so I punched him in the face. Not so hard as to knock him out, and he ran off crying.
Later that day, he and about 10 of his friends came back for me, armed with bats, chains, and knives. One swung a chain, which I caught, and swung him over my shoulder right into another guy's knife. I wrapped the chain around my fist, protecting my arm from another stab. I caught the stabber's arm, then saw a bat coming up just in time to step into it and wrap my arm around his neck. Meanwhile, the 4th guy is coming at me with a bat, so I nailed him in the face with a well-placed kick, ending in a backflip. The twisting snapped the guy's arm I had(the stab I caught with the chained arm), which then I released and used the fist wrapped in chain to punch the guy's head I had in the armlock. I picked up the dropped bat, so I was holding the bat in my left hand with the chain wrapped around the right.
Another guy with a knife came at me, and I blocked with the bat. The knife got stuck in the bat, removing that threat. One solid kick to the ribs, and a knee to his face as he was hunched over put him out of commission.
I almost didn't see the chain swinging around. It hit me in the neck and wrapped around, but I remained standing. I turned towards my next attacker before he could yank the chain, which would have tightened around my neck. Instead, it pulled away, and I swung my chain. My chain connected with the other guy's, and they wrapped around each other. I pulled, throwing him off balance and to the ground. I quickly dodged another guy's bat(he was trying to crack me over the head, swinging it like a damn sledgehammer!) When he was at the bottom of his swing, I kicked my leg up and brought my heel down squarely on top of his head. I saw the original racist moron charging me with a machete, so I swung my chained fist around, releasing the chain to whip around. It knocked him cold out in one shot, but his momentum kept him going, and he took a dive as if he were using a slip and slide, the only difference being that he left a trail of red. The few who were still conscious ran away, while I laughed maniacally, bathed in their friends' blood.