Did you know that a Satanist/Nephilim can give a demon to a Christian by just shaking hands with them at church.? The best way to avoid this is to make sure you have your armour on at all times.
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Yeah, I'm always wearing my Holy +2 Gloves of Dexterity. With those, not only can I touch things like cockatrice corpses, but I also have a holy weapon if I'm ever fighting a daemon unarmed!
I also always have my +3 Black Dragon Scale Mail, a silver shield, fireproof cloak of magic resistance, and, of course, Frostbrand!
This is a common misconception. Simple physical contact is very unlikely to result in transmission. However, unprotected sex and sharing drug needles are more likely to result in--oops, these are demons, not STDs. You ain't safe, child. They gon' gitcha anyway. Your only hope is to panic and run around in circles.
But better make sure it's at least a +1 and has the Holy attribute.
Also, try to max your willpower saving throw.
Sooo, the giant offspring of angels and human women are going around to churches, handing out demons via a handshake greeting, and this can be avoided if you go to church wearing armor?! Hell. As a historical recreationist, I know at least a dozen people who actually make armor, and most of them are pagan. I giggle at that. So, what about all those really short Satanists, or are the only Satanists also Nephilim? And why would the get of an angel even BE a Satanist in the first place? The mind boggles.
Shit. Guess that chainmail hauberk and those leather gauntlets I have'll come in handy, then, eh? Sheesh. Except I don't go to a church. Good call on that, I'd say. What a complete weirdo. Esther/whiterider needs to either take more medications, or less. This is special even for this specimen.
Or you could just be a dick and not shake hands with anyone...or you could start taking your meds again and come back to reality.
I swear, I don't understand the fundie obsession with demons and demon possession. You'd think that someone who believed their god was so totally and completely all powerful wouldn't be so terrified of him NOT being able to protect them.
Oooookaayyyyy......
This is new.
Ooooooooookaaayyyyyy
This is new............
I've been reading the whiterider/Esther posts over there at the crazy resistance forum. Old WR isn't fooling anybody but the "true believers." But then, I don't know how he could since he and his "mother" use exactly the same sentence structure and say exactly the same things about the same people. That boy was already out of his mind, now he's like a real-world Norman Bates. I wonder how long it will be before he starts killing in the name of god if he hasn't already.
Meh, my armor is kindof ornate and flashy. Well if you want to get technical I probably shouldn't wear it in church anyway since it buffs my shadow damage.
Could I just cast Power Word: Shield on myself before shaking someones' hand? The glowing aura is actually quite pleasant to look at.
Yeah, like I want to listen to all that clattering of armour when I'm in church.
And what are demons and satan doing in a church anyway? Is there any power that satan DOESN'T have? He seems to be able to walk all over the "abilities" of your god. Maybe you chose unwisely?
"Did you know that a filthy homo can give AIDS to a Christian by just violently anally raping them at church.? The best way to avoid this is to make sure you have your condom on at all times."
Same shit, different day.
Yeah, but none of that Daedric stuff, far to evil. Gotta be Amelion Ceremonial Armor, as it's the only decent good-guy armor in the game, unless you've got KotN.
Oh, wait.
You mean this dude ain't talikng computer games?
Sheesh. Kids these days. Too much fucking fiction, rots the brain.
As a matter of fact, I didn't. It's kind of hard to get possessed by something fictional.
Besides, who wants to wear big, clunky armour anyways?
"MOOOOOM! Where's my right plate gauntlet? I need it just in case I'm forced to shake hands with anyone! YES, MOM, I NEED IT! DO YOU WANT ME TO GET POSSESSED?! BECAUSE I WILL IF YOU DON'T GET ME THAT!"
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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