Welcome to Fundies Say the Darndest Things

You’re looking at an archive of the most hilarious, bizarre, ignorant, bigoted, and terrifying quotes from fundies all over the internet.

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MoonMan #racist #psycho lyrics.az

[From "R.I.P. Hitler"]

[Intro:]
Hey Hitler, rest in peace
You will always hold a special place in history

[Verse:]
Hitler, you were always my hero
killing and gassing Jews without a care
The way you manipulated a whole nation was astounding
You never did anything wrong, well, except k** yourself
If I had a choice I would make you the next McDonald's Mascot
You should be honored for killing that Jew filth
I even weep on April 30th
And celebrate April 20th for your birthday
So Hitler, you are my hero. Rest in peace

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MoonMan #racist lyrics.az

[Lyrics of "Ten Feet Higher lyrics"]

[Verse 1:]
We're building a wall between us and you spics
The Mexican problem is what the wall will fix
No longer will you and our whites intermix
Instead of our chicks, you'll get a face full of bricks
A great white wall to stop the brown infection
And send the spics back in the other direction
Fifty-five feet high, it's the perfect protection
Never again will you ruin a US election
You have to go back, and that's unconditional
The law is the law, you motherfucking imbecile
To cross this wall, you'll need a fucking miracle
Unless you're white, you'll be fuckin inadmissible
If you were any good, you'd become a citizen
Or at least pay your taxes at a bare minimum
God damn freeloader, quit playing innocent
And speak some fucking English, you shit-skinned dissident

[Hook:]
(Build the wall!) It's what we require
Between us and the murderer and rapist supplier
(Build the wall!) Complete with barbed wire
And just for you spics, we'll make it ten feet higher
(Build the wall!) It's what we desire
And Mexico will sure as shit be the buyer
(Build the wall!) You call me a liar?
Be careful, the wall just got ten feet higher

[Verse 2]
We should've had the great wall built far sooner
Our Mexican count would have been far fewer
And then I would have greater faith in our future
But instead we are stuck with this great brown tumor
It's time to redeport you, legal or illegal
You've overstayed your welcome amongst our people
Your anchor baby will never count as a visa
You were never, nor will you ever, be our equal
Twenty seventeen will be the year of the barrier
Ten feet higher, just to make you spics angrier
Tunnel detection, to keep you on the exterior
A tariff, to bring back Ford and Carrier
The age of the illegal wetback has ended
The future without you is far more splendid
The American way is far better defended
Far greater, far whiter, just as was intended

[Hook: x2]
(Build the wall!) It's what we require
Between us and the murderer and rapist supplier
(Build the wall!) Complete with barbed wire
And just for you spics, we'll make it ten feet higher
(Build the wall!) It's what we desire
And Mexico will sure as shit be the buyer
(Build the wall!) You call me a liar?
Be careful, the wall just got ten feet higher

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MoonMan #racist lyrics.az

[From "MLK vs. Moonman"]

You're a spear-chucker, suck my bfc
I've been smooth since 1943
You're not an American, unless you have white skin
If you're black, your life is total sin
I kill your people while wearing a grin
I used to own your kin
How does that make you feel?

You are falling into my master plan
My brothers in the klan
Are going to hop in a van
And come to kill every black man
Then we will make all the Jews crispy

Ooga-booga, you apes are so retarded
No wonder you're what society has discarded
Go back to Africa you wing-eating players
Or I will become a great nigger slayer

When long ago the gods created Earth
In his fair image men were shaped at birth

The beasts for lesser parts were next designed
Yet were they too remote from humankind
To fill the gap, and join the rest of man
The whites conceived a clever plan
A beast they wrought, in semi-human figure
They filled it with vice, and called the thing a nigger

I now remember why I hate blacks
It's because their skin color is so whack
I take them out to my shack
And I hit them in the sack

I really wish black people did not exist
I like to kill them with my fist
Just give their spine a twist
Then cross them off your list

I hate your chocolate face
Porch monkeys are a disgrace
Chimps came from outer space
It's time to end your race

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MoonMan #racist lyrics.az

[Lyrics of "(Over) 99 N**ers lyrics]

[INTRO]
If you're having nigga problems I feel bad for you son
I killed over 99 niggers, and this bitch is one

[VERSE 1]
I got niggers here on the KKK patrol
Get out ho, cause I'm 'bout to blow
Nigga and spics say I'm
(A fucking asshole)
Well I'm from the Klan where they break niggers' bones
If you grew up with black skin I say, "Woah!"
If you worked at a job you probably got no dough
I'm like, fuck niggers, you can kiss my whole asshole
Alright nigga, you're about to go [gunshot]
Got beef with feminists, I scream "Fuck hoes"
They don't suck my dick
(Women aren't whores, so)
The KKK says that life's a drag
When niggers can buy lots of White ass, fuckers
I don't know what niggers take me as
Or understand the intelligence that Moon Man has
I'm from McDonalds to KKK nigga, I ain't done
I killed over 99 niggers, and this bitch is one

[Chorus]
Over 99 niggers, and this bitch is one
If you're having nigga problems I feel bad for you son
I killed over 99 niggers, and this bitch is one

[VERSE 2]
The year is '73, and I'm with Christopher Nash
I'm in Colfax, hunting some black ass
I find this nigga girl; either I could kill her, or
Do it after I fuck her on the floor
Now I don't wanna be disrespectful to the KKK
But I had a dick, so I could fuck her face
So I pull off her clothes and I ask real slow
"Bitch, do you know what I'm raping you for?"

(Audrina)
Cause I'm young and I'm black and my ass is real low
Do I look like a mind-reader, sir? I don't know

(Moon Man)
Well you're right bitch, so let's not guess no more

(Audrina)
Who do you think I am?

[Moon Man]
You fucking slut, I think you're my whore
Now pull off that bra and those panties too
Are you carrying a knife so I can cut off those boobs?

(Audrina)
I ain't doing any of this shit

(Moon Man)
Bitch lick my dick
And while we're at it, let me fuck you wasted as shit

(Sun Man)
Well I ain't gonna let you screw my wife
Or cut her boobs off with a knife

(Moon Man)
Well fuck you nigga don't give me that crap

(Sun Man)
Get the hell out of here before I hit you with a baseball bat

(Moon Man)
Nah I won't back down to this bitch-ass nigga
And aimed my Glock at him
I said, "Say hello to Satan" [gunshot]
I've killed over 99 niggers, and this bitch is one

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MoonMan #racist lyrics.az

[Lyrics of "Northwest Front]

[Intro: Moon Man]
Northwest front (KKK!)
Northwest front (KKK!)
All of my white brothers in the northwest
Put your fucking hands up
(White Power!)

[Verse 1: Moon Man]
Niggers should be ashamed
Moon Man is back in the fucking game
Israel block my songs on YouTube
So I'm shoving my white dick in their poo-tube
Europe is going crazy
And every Swedish woman has a nigga baby
Triple-K Mafia, get your guns
Because in 2016, we're voting Donald Trump

[Hook x2: Ben Garrison]
Build the wall
Build it tall
Killing niggers and spics is the way I ball
Northwest Front, Northwest front
At Ferguson I go on the hunt

[Verse 2: Moon Man]
I get disgusted by spics
Seeing a single one makes me sick
And I can't stand blacks
Jigaboos just ask to be attacked
I never slack, always buying ammunition
And I never promote circumcision
But if an Israelite talks back
Send Muslims to attack (Allahu Akbar!)

[Hook x2: Ben Garrison]
Build the wall
Build it tall
Killing niggers and spics is the way I ball
Northwest Front, Northwest front
At Ferguson I go on the hunt

[Verse 3: Ben Garrison]
(KKK!)
Moon Man's Dad, just as bad
When I see a spic or nigga, I get real mad
Spent my whole life stocking up guns
Just in case niggers want to have fun
Wonder why Eminem raps so well?
It's 'cause he's white, that's easy to tell
But he cries himself to sleep at night
Because he still sounds like a nigga on the mic
It may be the first time you've heard from me
But stick around, just wait and see
I'm a real big guy and I bring the pain
Jews better hide (I'm crashing this plane!)

[Outro: Moon Man]
(KKK! K K K!)
Triple-K Mafia
Representing the Pacific North-West brotherhood
Shout-out to Donald Trump, vote in 2016
And don't forget to register with your Caucus

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MoonMan #fundie lyrics.az

[Lyrics of "49 Faggots and One Dune Coon lyrics"]

[Verse 1:]
When a gator kills a baby no one calls it a radical
That's because it's obvious that all of them are dangerous animals
The hand writing has been on the wall, clear and legible
Now we got a muzzy turning fruits into vegetables
It was a great night, it was homo-caust
Bonafide homo-cide, 50 lives lost
No Pulse, just Blood On The Dance Floor
Now the fags are more butthurt than before
Look here, a Muslim walks into a bar
And orders shots for everybody, hardy har har
And he should have killed more but he was not a straight shooter
Almost makes you wanna cry like that bitch Anderson Cooper
It's tragedy, too many faggots got away
So instead of Islam they're gonna die from AIDs
If survivors wanna feel guilty that's their prerogative
But I really hope they all remain HIV positive
The majority of the victims were spics
Taking loads in the face but this time not from dicks
Some had trouble deciding
Which bathroom to hide in
They weren't sure their gender matched the one they died in

[Hook x2:]
49 faggots and 1 dune coon
Rig the SIG
Pop the Glock
And shoot for the moon
Sand-niggers pulling triggers yeah it's something to see
They may be ignorant savages, but they're working for me