KIEV (Reuters) - A man shouting that God would keep him safe was mauled to death by a lioness in Kiev zoo after he crept into the animal's enclosure, a zoo official said on Monday.
"The man shouted 'God will save me, if he exists', lowered himself by a rope into the enclosure, took his shoes off and went up to the lions," the official said.
"A lioness went straight for him, knocked him down and severed his carotid artery."
The incident, Sunday evening when the zoo was packed with visitors, was the first of its kind at the attraction. Lions and tigers are kept in an "animal island" protected by thick concrete blocks.
76 comments
Exactly Skyfire. The bottom line is God is not an idiot, just because many of His followers are. This does not prove God does not exist, it proves that many of His followers are psychotic and need help. They mock His name by coming up with stupid antics like this.
sadchristian: "Exactly Skyfire. The bottom line is God is not an idiot, just because many of His followers are. This does not prove God does not exist, it proves that many of His followers are psychotic and need help. They mock His name by coming up with stupid antics like this."is omnipotent, omniscient and omni-benevolent, would he not know this man was mentally ill and help him rather than allowing him to be mauled to death by a lion? Sure, this guy was acting like a fucktard, but isn't the good and loving God the God of everyone including fucktards?
Khaine wrote:Of course the lioness could have been praying to a more focused god.
"Please, oh please dear Mother Bast. I've been sooo good. Please let one of these hairless apes do something stupid. I'll be quick and not make it suffer.... much.
Not Bast. Sekhmet. Lioness-headed goddess of violence and beer--both of which, I'm sure, were involved.
Irene
It was in Russia, so I doubt the man was named Danielle, might have been though.
Oh, yes, back in my day at the "zoo," at least one fundie jumped into my prison. I didn't touch him. As horrible as he is, he's a person too. Besides, I'm a vegan and he's high in saturated fat. I can't impress the sheilas if I weigh too much. Of course, he claimed "God" was saving him and I had to knock him on the head to make sure he didn't spread his fundieness to others.image
Maronan
As I've read in the comments at PZ Myers blog, this guy is an atheist martyr. Don't you see it?
Yeah but if he was mentally retarded and God had jumped in the save him. Don't you think that would have opened up a floodgate and all the other mentally challenged people would start jumping into lions mouths? It would be an epidemic. Even the fundies would start doing it, oh well then maybe God should have saved him afterall.
This'll be why they put that whole "don't put god to the test" thing in the book - so on those occasions when some chump is actually stupid enough to try shit like this and gets killed, they can just say that he was testing god and so doesn't deserve to be saved; whilst if anyone actually survives such an encounter, they can say that they weren't "testing" god but just generically strong in faith somehow whilst not actually trying to get god to do something, and so were miraculously saved. When you're making up crap like this, keeping such differences as vague and indefinable as possible is a good tactic.
It's reminiscent of taking out a loan - the bank will only lend you what you need if you can satisfy them that you can pay it back if things go wrong, which is another way of saying you don't actually need it.
@JadedRevenge: Kiev is in Ukraine, not Russia. With regards to the name Daniel, it does occur in Russia in the Jewish population. I expect the same applies in Ukraine. However, news reports have the unnamed man as an Azeri, and they are mostly Shiite Muslims.
"Let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, the birds of the air, and the cattle, and over all the wild animals and all the creatures that crawl on the ground." (Genesis 1:1-26)
I'd like to call to attention it doesn't say a goddamn thing about LIONS!
Yum yum. Deluded asshole, served al dente. (firm to the teeth)
"A man shouting that God would keep him safe was mauled to death by a lioness in Kiev zoo after he crept into the animal's enclosure, a zoo official said on Monday.
"The man shouted 'God will save me, if he exists', lowered himself by a rope into the enclosure, took his shoes off and went up to the lions," the official said."
PROTIP: The anime "Hanaukyo Maids La Verite" is not a documentary:
image
Now, if he'd gone into the Cheetahs' enclosure, then he'd still be alive. No such thing as the meme 'JESUS CHRIST IT'S A CHEETAH! GET IN THE...':
image
'...oh. Okay, carry on.'
They literally are big pussycats; they're more like canines in terms of behaviour.
So, not so much >:3 , more like :3
Kudos to Jaded_Revenge for finding this Darwin Awards nomination. Yep, even the ultra-reliable Reuters can provide lulzworthy FSTDT material. Gotta love 'em.
Another fine example of how religious fervour and unimaginable stupidity go together like hand and glove.
Someone should have told the moron that the thick concrete blocks were put there for a reason....or on second thoughts, maybe not. Lions need to eat, too.
Meanwhile, on Rapture Ready...
Fundie 1: "guess he didn't have any faith!"
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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