DENVER — Denver's public schools are debating whether to offer contraceptives in school clinics.
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The contraceptive proposal drew negative responses from religious groups and organizations who want to reduce the teen pregnancy rate.
70 comments
Yes, because teens getting pregnant is part of the New World Order's master plan!
Irony?
These people need to get over their fear of sex.
Only the most brainwashed of kids are going to keep it in their pants. Mommy and Daddy's generation wasn't much better, get off your high horse.
I'm going to design a new line of chastity belts for those retards' teenagers. It should automatically receive the endorsement of the cranio-anal set.
Just to be sneaky, I'll incorporate an automatic masturbatory function.....
Reducing the teen pregnancy rate isn't a priority for fundies. Their first priority is to stop teens from the "sin" of having more fun than them having sex. Reducing teen pregnancy, if it happens as a result, is just an added bonus.
Fundie logic: if they're afraid of getting pregnant, they won't have sex; but if they do, then the hell with them: they deserve the punishment of getting pregnant for the sin of fornication.
This is utter bullshit. Christian groups do not want to reduce teen pregnancy rates. They want those kids knocked up and married by that holy age of 14.
I know fundies with pregnant teenage girls, they're excited about the baby, but they want those two 16 year olds married ASAP. And of course the girl drops out of school, because she has found her true calling.
Abstinence doesn't work! The highest teen pregnancy rates are in the so-called bible belt, because those kids believe stupid fairy tales about how "not" to get pregnant.
Ah come on, give them some credit! I'll bet this is part of some greater plan that will destroy the teen pregnancy rate!
Of course I couldn't imagine what it could be, but i'm sure it will be an extremely cunning feint. Like when George Bush told the terrorists to "bring it on", these protestors will have something up their sleeve other than contraception to deal with the crisis. They must just have their reasons for making themselves appear to be utterly incompetant. It'll be part of the plan.
Yes, the way to lower the teen pregnancy rate is to ensure that more sperm fertilise eggs, then watch the Denver religious groups spring into action. It's the only explaination.
I think the "logic" here is: if contraceptives are handed out then teens will start using them and start having sex. Since contraceptives are part of an anti-Christian conspiracy they actually have a 100% fail rate thus ensuring teen pregnancy. Then all the atheists get to laugh as they further drag the world into hell. Only through the fear that god will kill you if you don't abstain can there be no more teen pregnancy.
Ow, that hurt my brain to type that.
From the same sanity-free page:
'Get Newt’s weekly newsletter delivered straight to your inbox - Free!'
That is far, far too expensive.
*looks at the map of the Bible Belt*
Oh, yeah... that's going REAL well. In Bizarro World.
Whoa--what planet did these people say they were from?
Geezis...
I can see the logic...
Ban seatbelts to reduce severity of car accidents!
Ban dissent and discussion to reduce the risk of someone making an informed decision during a democratic election!
Ban education of women to combat feminism!
Because it makes too much sense to do something that works.
I think we've stumbled upon the Fundamentalists' Secret Motto, here.
Eo, unfortunately I think there are MANY reasons to be ashamed to be a Coloradan.
JonBenet, Columbine, Kobe, Marilyn Musgrave, Tom Tancredo, the church shootings, James Dobson, and on and on and on...
As an aside, why has no one invited me to one of dem der "Rainbow Parties" Oprah won't shut up about? I'm a handsome guy, but the exclusion makes me sad. :'(
If only I were invited, I wouldn't need the contraceptives! :(
But seriously, abstinence does NOT work. Just look at the disgrace of Texas. What WORKS works. As a teenager, I can testify that there will be hot, horny teenage ACTION whether you have abstinence indoctrination or not. So you might as well teach us to do it right, right?
1,500 years ago, these would be the people insisting that regular bathing causes disease, and that those who say otherwise are degenerates who want to promote nakedness!
The grand plan to reduce teen pregnancy:
Because this has SUCH a stellar track record. Oh, sorry, my mistake. It was just a bunch of oddly premature babies, and girls going to visit their aunt ot of state, and come back to find out that Mom had a new baby brother or sister waiting for them. Odd little coincidences like that...
Yes, (sarcasm=on), the teenage pregnancy rates of communist liberal european countries like The Netherlands, Sweden, Germany where contraceptives are freely available for teenagers are incredibly higher than those of christian conservative US states like Texas, Georgia, Mississippi where contraceptives are very hard to get and teenagers need their parents permission to buy.
In The Netherlands, teenage girls are used to get pregnant before reaching age 21, some are even getting pregnant multiple times, while in Texas teenage pregnancy is something nearly unheard of. (sarcasm=off)
Okay, back to reality.
Teenage pregnancy rates in The Netherlands: 12 per 1000 teenage girls.
Should make one think, doesn't it?
I think one, maybe two girls got pregnant, and had the baby, in my school when I was a teenager, out of about a thousand pupils.
Becoming a parent before 20 is very unusual over here. Most people wait until they are 25-30.
The Extinguish fires using Water instead of Gasoline proposal drew negative responses from religious groups and organizations who want to reduce outbreaks of Houses Burning Down.
The Remove bears from Cars proposal drew negative responses from religious groups and organizations who want to reduce outbreaks of Car Crashes.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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