ViralCel #sexist #racist #psycho incels.co

Magicels: The Blackpilling (CARDCELS GTFIH)

Hello there and welcome to my card making cope thread. Will update when I have more ideas, open to feedback and suggestions.

Inspired by Bufophiliac og post:
image

Transcript(several spoof Magic The Gathering cards:
“Balding Indian Janitor” - 1 Any, 1 Green - Creature - Subhuman Incel - Misogyny 2 (Whenever this creature blocks or becomes blocked by a Foid, this creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn) - “Show bobs and vagene.” - 2/2
“St. BlackOps2Cel” - 2 White, 1 Any - Creature - Subhuman Incel - Indestructible; Other Subhumans get +1/+1 and have protections from Foids, Normies, and Cucks. - “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” - 1/1
-“The Supreme Gentleman” - 1 White, 1 Red - Land Creature – Subhuman Incel - Misogyny 3; Whenever a Foid enters the battlefield, put a Rejection counter on The Supreme Gentleman; 1 Red, 1 White, Tap, Remove three Rejection counters from The Supreme Gentleman and sacrifice him: Destroyup to five target creatures. - “I don’t know what your problem is, girls.”
“Slaying Queen” - 2 Black, 2 Any - Creature - Human Foid - Whenever Slaying Queen blocks or gets blocked by a Chad or Tyrone, exile that creature and place a black 1⁄1 Spawn creature onto the battlefield - Someone gotta take responsibility for these kids” - ⅔
“The Rope” - 3 Any - Artifact - 1 Any, Tap, sacrifice a subhuman: You draw two cards and gain 5 life. “The ultimate cope, and our only hope. A permanent solution to a permanent problem”
“Gymcel Manlet” - 2 White, 3 Any - Creature – Subhuman Incel - Overcompensate - 1 White, 3 Any (1 White 3 Any: This creature becomes a Human Nomrie until end of turn.); Whenever Gymcel Manlet overcompensates, put a +1/+1 counter on Gymcel Manlet. - ¾
“Nerdy Guy” - 3 Any 2 Blue - Creature - Human Chad - When Nerdy Guy enters the battlefield, gain control of target foid. - “Silly Incels, you know noting about women. Just look at my boyfriend, he’s a total nerd!! Tee-hee!”
“Surgerymaxxing Hopefuls” 1 Red, 3 Fire - Creature - Subhuman Incel - Overcompensate - 1 Red 1 Any; Whenever Surgerymaxxing Hopefuls overcompensates, flip a coin. If you win the filp. put a +1/+1 counter on Surgerymaxxing Hopefuls, otherwise remove a +1/+1 counter from Surgerymaxxing Hopefuls. Then, if Surgerymaxxing Hopefulls has three or more +1/+1 counters on it, sacrifice Surgerymaxxing Hopefuls and put two 5⁄5 white Human Chad creature tokens onto the battlefield. - 2⁄2.
“Tinder” - 3 Any 3 Red - Enchantment - All Foids get +2/+2.; Subhumans cannot attack or block, and their activated abilities cannot be played. - “It’s Over”
“Soy Boy” - 2 Any 1 Green- Creature . Human Cuck - Male Feminist (Preven all damage this creature woould deal to Foids.). “I would appreciate if you left me and my wife’s son alone.”

Latest expansion:
imageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimage

Transcript”NEET Squad” - 7 Any - Creature - Human Incel - This spell costs 1 Mana less to cast for each Normie or Cuck on the battlefield. NEET Squad’s power and toughness are each equal to the number of untapped Incels you control. - “Can’t beat the NEET.” - */*.
“NPC” - 1 Any - Creature - Human Normie - NPC can’t attack or block alone. NPC gets +1/+1 for each other creature in play named NPC. - “if (offended=true) say “normie platitudes”;” - 1⁄1.
“The Blackpill” - 3 Any 3 Black - Legendary Enchantment - The Blackpill can’t be countered. All Humans you control are now Incels in addition to their other subtypes. All Incels in your control get +2/+2 and gain vigilance. - “It never began.”
“Juggernaut Law” - 2 Any 3 Black or Red - Enchantment - All Foid creatures with power 4 or less have haste. All Foid creatures with power 3 or less have trample. All Foid creatures with power 2 or less can’t be blocked. - “You can’t keep a woman’s dating potential down. She is unstoppable. Any flaws she has, just make her stronger.”
“Lay Down And Rot” - 2 Any 1 Black - Sorcery - Target creature gets -3/-3 until end of turn. Put a -1/-1 counter on it. - “Tour’s over boyo, time to ldar.”
“Wagecuck” - 2 Any 2 Green - Creature - Human Normie - Tap. Put a -1/-1 counter on this creature and put 1 Mana in your Mana pool. It becomes a Cuck until the end of yor turn. Tap: Remove a -1/-1 counter from this creature and draw a card. - “W- Would you like fries with that, sir?” - 4⁄2
“Fakeup” - 1 Red 1 Green - Target Foid gets +5/+0 and gains haste until end of turn. - “I don’t wear makeup for men, I do it for myself.
“Trucel” - 2 Any 1 Blue 1 White - Creature - Subhuman Incel - Defender; Return any Foid that would fight this creature to its owner’s hand instead. - “Be honest guys, is it over for me?” - 0⁄10
“Betabuxxer” - 2 Any 1 White 1 Blue - Creature - Human Cuck - Tap: The next Foid spell you cast this turn costs 2 Mana less to cast. Male Feminist - “Happy wife happy life!”
“Online Dating Service” - 1 Any 1 Red 1 Black - Artifact - 1 Mana, Tap: Reveal the top card of your library. If it’s a Chad card, put the card into your hand. If it’s a Human card, you may put that card into your hand. If it’s a Subhuman card, exile it. - “Just put yourself out there, bro!”

8 comments

Confused?

So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!

To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register. Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.