John Cimbala, MakiinStaysUp #fundie

John Cimbala, MakiinStaysUp #fundie youtube.com

(The description)
[…]But what about ape-men? Ape-men are never mentioned anywhere in the Bible. Why? Because there were no ape-men! The Bible clearly states that human beings were created in the image of God, fully human from the very beginning. Likewise no fossils or bones of bonafied ape-men have ever been discovered or dug up. Why? Because they never existed. There is no such thing as an "ape-man!" In fact, all such claims of fossil ape-men are either (1) fully human, (2) fully ape, (3) some other creature, or (4) a hoax. Human beings did not evolve from some kind of ape-like creature. Don't confuse cavemen with ape-men.There is no such thing as an ape-man!

(Comment from user)

@MakiinStaysUp

yeah they trick you and tell us we evolved from the ape like men. but god curses the isrealites in the tower of babel and turned them into ape men thats how humans ever got straight hair the isrealites had wooly hair

12 comments

You're confused because the premise you have is malformed. People aren't looking for "ape-men" in any real sense. We've found hominids that are closer to the common ancestors of extant apes and homo sapiens.

It'd be like demanding to prove the biblical Flood, you have to produce a half schnauzer half canine. It's an asinine request, isn't it?

"But what about ape-men? Ape-men are never mentioned anywhere in the Bible.”
Neither are glaciers. Or the Equator. The Southern Cross. It does mention satyrs and unicorns, though. Basilisks.

“ Why? Because there were no ape-men!”
It doesn’t mention Penguins, does that mean there were no Penguins?

"The Bible clearly states”
This is the Bible that states hail happens when God scoops it out of chests above the sky and throws it down through trapdoors? Just checking. You were saying?

"that human beings were created in the image of God, fully human from the very beginning. Likewise no fossils or bones of bonafied”
Bona Fide. Two words. And not English. If you don’t know them, don’t use them. It doesn’t make you look like a schmart guy, see?

"ape-men have ever been discovered or dug up. Why? Because they never existed.”
Pretty sure no one ever suggested the creature you’re imagining existed.

"There is no such thing as an "ape-man!" In fact, all such claims of fossil ape-men are either (1) fully human, (2) fully ape, (3) some other creature, or (4) a hoax.”
You can prove this? I hope with something other than a Jack Chick Tract?

"Human beings did not evolve from some kind of ape-like creature.”
So confident. So confused.

"Don't confuse cavemen with ape-men.There is no such thing as an ape-man!”
Cool! Now do basilisks!

Here is a sticker on a laptop:

image

The Canadian enginerd AvE loves him a good sticker.

Now, do you think that such a sticker would exist on an item used by he who is a Catholic, OPs…?!

Whilst not Catholics, here is the grave of a certain someone in the central place of worship of the Protestant Church of England, Westminster Abbey:

image

Can’t be due to the fact that Charles Darwin was initially in training to join the clergy of the C-of-E prior to his discoveries that were ultimately proved right by geneticists years later, eh…?!

@Creativerealms #205403

In that sense, we are all ape-men (and ape-women).

(Edited for clarity)

But what about ape-men? Ape-men are never mentioned anywhere in the Bible. Why? Because there were no ape-men!

So? Pretty sure Australia and Antarctica were never mentioned either, but I don’t see you denying they exist…

The Bible clearly states

Doesn’t the Bible also “clearly” state stuff like insects having the wrong amount of limbs? Or that the Earth has a ceiling? Or that Pi is the wrong number? Or that Giants are/were a thing despite the Square-Cube Law clearly saying this is physically impossible?

“Ape-men are never mentioned anywhere in the Bible. Why?”

Because they’d died out before it was written. Duh.

(You could try Ramayana, you’ll get a surprise.)

You're right, I'm sure all the primitive hominids were actually fundie preachers.

There is no such thing as an ape-man because we are apes.

This is the results of using a religious book as a science textbook.

John Cimbala, MakiinStaysUp #fundie youtube.com

12 comments

Confused?