"All this business about goblins and jack-o'-lanterns all comes out of demonic rituals of the Druids and the people who lived in England at that particular time," Robertson said on the show.
He then suggested shifting the holiday toward a more Christian focus.
"I think churches can have Halloween parties," Robertson said. "You can bob for apples ... and turn it into a Christian festival, and that’s what we ought to do. We need to redeem these days, but that day was given over to Satanic things.”
31 comments
1) Many churches already have Halloween parties. The church down the road from where I grew up had great Halloween parties with, yes, apple-bobbing but also creepy costume contests and spooky story contests.
2) This is also the Jack Chick version of history. I.e. wrong.
Too late you senile old coot. Your church "redeemed" the holiday of Samhain when the church was trying to "civilize" the pagans centuries ago.
It's the same as with Easter and Christmas too. You christians are the least imaginative fucks when it comes to making up your holidays and have to just re-purpose popular celebrations of whatever poor community you've decided to invade this time around.
It wasn't just the Druids you soulless bastards stole from, and Halloween is already a christianized version of Samhain.
So what you're saying is, you'd like to suck even more fun out of it if possible?
Fuck you. Keep your skanky mitts off of my festival, you joy-deprived Orc.
Turn Halloween into a Christian festival complete with depictions of the burning of heretics, the drowning and hanging of suspected witches, the horrors of the Inquisition, and the revered image of a man nailed to a cross to die a lingering death from shock and dehydration.
Scare the bejesus out of those little kids.
""I think churches can have Halloween parties," Robertson said. "You can bob for apples ... and turn it into a Christian festival, and that’s what we ought to do.'
Why, sure! You can pick out some female parishioner to play the witch, and drown her in the town pond.
So either it would be sanitized beyond all recognition or it would turn into something Vlad Tepes would approve of, what with people on stakes and being tortured by clerics and priests. I think I like the version that we have now, thanks.
Halloween is all about scaring away goblins and demons, trolls and ghouls so that All Hallows Day could be celebrated for the Dearly Departed.
Jack-o-lanterns probably come out of practicality; when you've hollowed out the edible parts of pumpkins and other large vegetables, the shell can be used as light-receptacles to light up a very dark night.
"at that particular time"? From 200 BCE to 200 CE? That is one long-lived set of demonic rituals, that is! Especially since fairly little is known about the druids.
Halloween already is a Christian festival, silly. It's All Hallows' Evening, and Hallowed things are usually Christian.
That day was given over to fun-and-game things, stupid.
Satan only acts on God's orders, doesn't he?
Also, I just remembered: Hell Houses. Many US churches have a Hell House at Halloween. They're designed to look like a standard haunted house attraction from the outside but when you get in, they present scenes of people suffering in hell after abortions, for homosexuality, for not believing in the christian god, etc. You have to pass through a 'prayer room' in order to leave, where you are mercilessly proselytized to.
Sounds like a hoot , no?
(I own a copy of this film. Some of it is hilarious. They set up a 'Satanic' scene in their house using a star of David.)
> "I think churches can have Halloween parties," Robertson said. "You can bob for apples ... and turn it into a Christian festival, and that’s what we ought to do. We need to redeem these days, but that day was given over to Satanic things.”
They already do, silly. I actually run the cotton candy machine at one "fall festival" at a local church. It's a major event in the neighborhood.
You're behind the times.
There is no War on Christmas, but I'm getting awfully tired of the War on Halloween, especially since it's my favorite holiday and the one unabashed holiday set aside for both kids and adults to enjoy without all of the pseudoreligious nonsense and family obligations.
The kids are a little nervous bending over around your type of party crowd Pat.
Besides, haven't you heard? Kirk Cameron made it clear that all Halloween festive events were totally Christianized (fundamentally) the day Kirk first walked into church around 30 or 40 years ago when apparently the world began and Bananas were available to all.
You were born over 60 so you just can't relate Pat.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register . Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.