Some time ago– Close to the start of this year, in fact– I succumbed to anxiety about my financial situation and to simple, cumulative lust and greed, and decided to try selling “adult” artwork under a second name. I posted artwork on and off on a couple of well-known sites under the synonym “Xanaduxxx”.
It took considerable time, but a little over a month or so ago I finally caved to my guilt and my conscience and repented of it in tears. I emptied the online archives, deleted the artwork from my computer, and posted a confession in the forums on this site, for anyone who had questions.
Well it seems that in the time my porn art was online it has done what the internet does and propagated to two or three other locations on the web. I’ve finally shored up my courage and willpower and sent Do Not Post requests to the sites in question, but I’ve no doubt there are samples of it floating about in the ether somewhere, online or in other people’s computers. And I am sure there are quite a number of vindictive people who would use this against me given the opportunity.
So now you know. I’m still struggling with the sin and the temptation, and probably always will. I only pray that Jesus will strengthen me to cast it off; I have prayed for His forgiveness, and I pray that you all will forgive me as well.
For those of you considering dipping your toe in that oh-so-lucrative(/sarcasm) field– it’s not worth it. Even if I’d made anything at it, it would not have been worth it. The promise of easy money and carnal indulgence is just bait on a hook. The Devil made a FOOL out of me, don’t let him do the same to you.