Forgetaboutthelonely #sexist reddit.com

Feminist shaming tactics cause lasting sexual repression in men most sympathetic to them

I saw myself as a feminist, but I was also bullied. In high school, there was a course on women's studies. And the girls used what they learned as a bludgeon to bully the guys they didn't like. It wasn't just that they disliked the guy who asked them out awkwardly. Now, he was a creepy entitled misogynist objectifying them. Any guy they didn't like who talked about girls and his attraction to them (as hormone-filled teenage boys do) were labeled as sexual abusers and predators. The message we got was clear: "As a man, you do NOT show your interest unless she expresses hers first." I internalized this for years and it pushed me into a number of abusive and manipulative "friendships", because all we're left with for ways to express interest is being nice or being deceptive.

And I'm not the only one who has noticed this:

By the time I realized that I was a lesbian, I’d internalized that all attraction to women was objectifying and evil. I internalized these messages from exposure to feminist memes, norms, and communities. It was feminist messages, not homophobic ones, that made it hardest for me to come to terms with my sexuality. And it has happened by now to enough people that 'well obviously you’re misinterpreting it’ is starting to wear thin as an excuse.


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I spent my formative years feeling not “entitled,” not “privileged,” but terrified. I was terrified that one of my female classmates would somehow find out that I sexually desired her, and that the instant she did, I would be scorned, laughed at, called a creep and a weirdo, maybe even expelled from school or sent to prison.

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Confused?

So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!

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