RE: Julia Long's awesome quote
You can pretend to be us. You can put it into law that your paperwork says that you are us. You can force apologies, through gritted teeth, from people that may or may not have said that you are not us, depending on your own idiosyncratic interpretation of their words. You can take our places in universities and jobs. But you will never be us. Deep down, you know that, and that’s why you keep pushing. You keep wishing that someday, if you push enough, if you get enough people to be your yes-men, if you get enough people to kowtow, then you will be us. But you also know that that’s not going to happen. You will never be us. It’s impossible. It cannot happen. That’s why you’re so angry and frustrated - because no matter how much you achieve, it never will be enough.
So true. I’m heterosexual and struggle to form wide-ranging friendships because 1) re men, how do you befriend men genuinely? Never occurred to me and 2) I’m very much a “this is what I think” person which turns off a lot of women who are conditioned to always hype up the other person and not express unpleasant opinions unapologetically. Still, I’ve been the few close friends type of person and I’ve been madly in love with a couple of men, one man who knew me for over half of my life and there is STILL something about sitting next to a woman you adore that brings a feeling of comfort and ease that no man in my life has ever. Is it the same intensity and being in love for years? Well, no. Is it something else entirely that has somehow it’s own special, greater trust and feeling of being safe? Yes. Do I think a biological male is capable of feeling this toward a woman? No.