These Men Were Promised Lesbians
(note by submitter: continued from https://fstdt.com/W9RG.5BJY$S6K )
Being cruel to #BeKind
Trans women often end up dating each other, even finding real happiness in the arrangement - though for heterosexual men it rarely seems like their first choice. The relationships they have with actual women are more often than not the wives who decided to stick around, or young “queer” women living their truth that TWAW (trans women are women).
Many try out the chasers (ostensibly straight men, but with a fetish for transgender women) before swearing off them. They might try the dating scene as openly trans, before eventually, inevitably, getting creative with the truth. Sometimes they are successful, in which case they are ecstatic, which only serves to deepen the sadness of the other men in the groups.
But as they burn through their options, the sense of desperation often deepens.
And then comes the dawning realisation that everyone has been lying to them, which is when the anger begins to build: “Feeling crappy about my looks from trying to date. 3 years of hormones, FFS and still I get brushed off immediately because they can clock me....and don’t want to be with a transgender woman.”
The political hugboxing of AGPs
A civil rights movement is one in which you win hearts and minds. You convince people to give rights to those who didn’t have them before, as Helen Joyce puts it in her excellent book Trans:when ideology meets reality. The process, which usually takes decades or more, has been sped up in the case of “trans” people. “You might think it a good thing that such a delay is a thing of the past,” says Joyce. “But in fact it’s an indication that transactivism is not a civil rights movement at all.”
Gay rights, female enfranchisement, and desegregation took ages, and had to be built from the ground up via speeches and rallies where the favour of majorities was won. Only then did these movements take their cases to the courts. Trans activists went straight to the politicians, avoiding the painstaking process of convincing women to extend access to their spaces, identities and bodies.