"Let me tell you my personal ordeal with a Ouija board.
Oh. Goody. An Anecdote. Those are NEVER just made-up bullshit to justify converting.
“I was 23 years old. (I know that was back in the Bronze Age, but divination hasn't changed.)”
How do you know divination hasn’t changed?
“I was addicted to a Ouija board. I had people driving 100 miles to put their hands on the glass object, ask the board questions, and have it spell out answers.”
The whole point of a Ouija board is that you don’t have to get a specialist, you can just get a couple of people together and get your own fortune.
And, as pointed out above, how could you not konw what the planchette is called? Seriously, your reputation extends 100 miles, but it’s ‘the glass thing.’??
“I was so good at it that the glass object could move with no hands on it.”
Um… Good at what? You’re not supposed to be the one who ‘moves’ the planchette, the spirits are. But you’re telling us YOU were the one moving the planchette without touching it?
“It made predictions and many of them came true.”
Yeah, my dad used to do that every election year and all it took was two beers.
“It instilled power in me that was stunning. The glass object that spelled out words would often spin around the board in a frenzy, and it was always talking about dark, evil things.”
I think i’f seen this Chick Tract. Two girls, stuff they learned from reading Harry Potter even though there’s no Ouija board in Harry Potter…
"All predictions were negative. It scared many participants. It has supernatural power, but since it is of the devil, not all predictions came true because the devil does not know the future.”
Maybe not Chick. Might have been Goosebumps.
“When I asked the board where it got its power, it spelled S-A-T-A-N.”
Because that’s what Satan does. He lies except when asked a direct question. Yeah, sure.
“If you think I am doing this for sensationalism, I can tell you that it has not been easy reliving my experience.”
Uh huh. Have you ever touched a Ouija board? Saw one in a movie, once, I’ll bet.
"I do it only to spare some of you from my mistakes.”
What happened with the demon?