( tacocat )
I figured out why I dislike lying about people's sex

I had to navigate childhood trying not to anger my mother, who was borderline. I always had to walk small and tell white lies to try to keep her from being angry with me. I had to be extremely good at reading her mood so I knew how to behave and what I could say.

When I see people saying there's no harm in "respecting people's pronouns" and "being kind," it brings me back to my childhood. It's the same effort I made to avoid being an emotional (and sometimes physical) punching bag, and I won't do it. I am not responsible for other people's mental health. I will not walk on eggshells for anyone. That kind of stress can take years off your life, and it's not worth it.

( Gladys_Kravitz )
Same. I would say more, but this subject is honestly so exhausting. I've talked about my Nmom a few times on here already and it's draining every time.

These people give me the exact same horrible, tight, nervous, sick feeling deep inside—their behavior is a carbon copy of her narcissistic abuse.

( tacocat )
That's okay. We get it. I think there's a point where you just don't want to talk about it any more, so thank you for commenting. :)

( Gladys_Kravitz )
Thanks for understanding. The best thing I can do for myself is honestly just move on. The more time I spend dwelling on it, the worse I get. I can't change the past, and I will NEVER get a good enough answer as to why she treated me that way.

I've noticed that forcing people to disclose more than they want to is actually part of TRAs behavior. They always want an explanation that involves a lot of private things, like having to explain your "genital fetish" or why you get upset about men in the locker room (they try to force you to talk about your trauma).

It's my mother's behavior all over again. I wasn't allowed privacy, if she wanted to know what I was thinking/feeling she would physically corner me and force me to tell her my innermost thoughts. It was straight up psychological torture.