“Breasts are how women communicate with God.”
Flashback to the lunchroom in 4th grade and the punchline, ‘Come in, Tokyo…’
“It's why they grow during pregnancy - good women spend more time speaking w the lord, asking him how to be mothers”
I dunno. I talk to my wife’s breasts A LOT. I mean, I talk to HER, but i’m facing… Anyway, talking to them doesn’t make them grow.
“This is also why women with small breasts are evil. They've abandoned communication w God and you can see it from their chests”
Um… Please, then, explain strippers and prostitutes with large natural breasts, then?
I mean, if piety is proportional to cup size, then the Wedding School we attended for our Catholic Ceremony should have resembled the breast-feeding class we took after our firstborn arrived. They did not.
There are just so many holes in this, compared to the real world.
Kinda makes you look like a total tit, you know?
“Athiest women try to trick you with implants,”
And no woman who attends church ever gets implants?
“but no true Christian believes them.”
So, wait, of breast size is a way of gauging the woman’s connection to god, then I’d guess we could measure (or estimate) a man’s connection by how many dollar bills he stuffs in the g-string of the stripper with fake boobs…
“The lord speaks only through big naturals”
Oh! That explains it! First time my wife let me touch them, I heard a voice saying “Rejoice Always!” That was God? Well, I’m not in a position to argue the point.
