“Catholicism is objectively the coolest religion.”
I don’t think you know what ’objective’ means.
Cool is a subjective judgment. I don’t think you CAN be objectively cool.
“What other religion allows you to literally eat God every day?”
If God is omnipresent, he’s in everything I eat. And my teeth. So even that dry white bread toast the Mormons gave us is eating God. Literally.
"What other religion has so many miracles that they attempt to disprove them with science before accepting them as legitimate?”
Who uses naturalistic science to establish miracles as supernatural events?
And why aren’t they on better medication?
“Catholicism united our people against the Muslim hordes"
United,huh? How many people have the Catholics burned at the stake for heresy?
“Our Saints were incredible and inspiring.”
Ste. Brigid was a locally-worshiped pagan god that your people stole as a saint, to preserve the story and claim the people.
Same way you stole Winter Solstice and the Vernal Equinox.
“Atheism is illogical,”
Feel free to demonstrate this logically.
“and everything else is complete pagan garbage.”
Says the Church established by the pagan Constantine…
"So if you aren't already a Catholic, when are you going to convert to the one true faith?”
Well, right NOW, i won’t out of fear I’ll become as historically inept and self-congratulatory as you…