Do You Carry Tracts?
You and I are in a fight for the souls of the lost. We are told to fight the good fight of faith. Are you armedfor battle? Do you always carry Gospel tracts? They are bullets in your gun. So don't leave home without them. The enemy wants to shoot you to pieces. Here's how to enter combat. Walk up to the enemy. Give him a warm greeting. Say, "Good morning. How are you?" That will disarm him. Then draw! Whip out a tract and ask, "Did you get one of these?" The purpose of the "bullet" is to get him to surrender to your will. Your desire is to speak to him about God, and the tract will quickly get you there. So, get yourself a good reputation as one who is quick on the draw.
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“Do You Carry Tracts?”
“You and I are in a fight for the souls of the lost.”
“Then draw! Whip out a tract and ask, "Did you get one of these?" The purpose of the "bullet" is to get him to surrender to your will.”
“Your desire is to speak to him about God, and the tract will quickly get you there. So, get yourself a good reputation as one who is quick on the draw.”
You and I are in a slight foul for the soft watchers of Lost. We are to fold the good tight fight of math. Are you fired for cattle Barry? Do you always tract Gospels? They are gullets in your bun. So don't leave me without a hotel. The enemy shoots you to swint to peace. Here's how to enter my wombat. Cake up to the men. Wave him a grim greeting. Say, "Hood morning. Who are you?" That will arm his mid. When draw! Trip out a chat and ask, "Did you bet one of these?" The purpose of the "gullet" is to get Will to surrender to our gym hit. Your reside is to speak to him about Tod and where the city quack will get you. So, get yourself a rotation as one pure dog who is quick on the drag.
Traditional metaphorical swords are guns and bullets now?
Apart from that, well, it reminds me of my youth as a JW. It could have been better. Still, we didn't call the strangers we were visiting (in this adaptation, let's call it invading their grounds) "the enemy". Our rhetoric was not bullets and disarming.
And fortunately, there are people who will greet you merrily not because they have a "conditional love to win the enemy" agenda. Just because they want to be friendly. Not assholes and the ones who want to be your enemy but are hypocritically pretending otherwise.
And excellent point by KeithInc., to "disarm me" you'd need much better arguments, I know all of your flawed justifications.
Hmm I would recommend #psycho ...
Every few years I get a small book in my mailbox which tries to tie everything in the past 50 years or so to the coming apocalypse. It’s basically the same book each time, just a bit updated. I read it in mild amusement and then chuck it in the recycling bin. I’m not sure if it’s supposed to be for recruiting; in order for it to work, you’d have to be well-versed in common Evangelical interpretations of the Bible, poorly informed on recent history, at least a bit gullible or prone to magical thinking, and somehow not already one of them. It’s not necessarily for recruiting but maybe some sort of warning for the faithful, as it doesn’t clearly announce its intentions. Whatever, they’re free to waste their money on it.
I’ve been working at a truck stop for a few months short of 2 years now. Once in a great while, when I go to clean the restrooms, I’ll find “Chick tracts” left there by somebody. Of course, then I go and immediately throw them all away. (I think I’ve read and laughed at most of them by now anyway, lol)
I carry the memory of what fellow Brit K9 Kuro said in an introduction to the one formerly of the parish of Nijisanji ID Mika Melatika to VShojo:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dY2ghGVjxZ4
Certainly the mirth generated by his description of her having huge… tracts of land is something memorable.
You’ll be forgotten, Ray Cumfart. At least being a scam artist is just part of Michi Mochievee’s lore , bananabrain.
You do it for real with more than just your ‘tracts’: me, I wouldn’t hold ‘em. But perhaps I would if yours had motherfucking Jojo references as Michi’s does.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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