-BastAnon-

@-BastAnon-

Galaxygirl #crackpot #magick

(Before me stands what appears to be a hyper-realistic statue of silver and gold, depicting a short, stocky man wearing a crown and regal robes, surrounded by ornate golems. Yet soon, it reveals its true nature, speaking with a sonorous if metallic voice and gesturing with natural fluidity.)

Behold, I am Orbatur of the Golden Instinct! High Lord of Alchemy, Grand Transmuter, Gleaming Emperor! It took me centuries of research, of intrigue, of battle against rivals and self-righteous fools alike, but in the end, they all fell to my powers (I see a younger Orbatur, less richly dressed and still made of flesh and blood, spread out a strange powder at a council of his kinsfolk, their faces freezing in horror as a metallic sheen spreads across their bodies), and when the Chalgotrian Convergence occurred once more, I was able to seize its energies to complete the Maximum Opus: to refine my very world from base matter to precious gem and noble metal! (I see a magical shockwave running across a planet, converting everything and everyone into gleaming gold, shining jet, brilliant diamond, glittering quicksilver.) Rejoice, humans of Earth, for, in a respect to the leader of yours that you call Donald Trump and his appreciation for my values and aesthetics, I have chosen your world to be granted that same ennoblement as I brought upon my own!

Various Anonymous Cowards #sexist #homophobia #fundie #conspiracy

A mass exodus of white middle-aged programmers is upon us! No longer will they be oppressed by the tyranny of false sexual harrassment charges, nagging gold-diggers demanding alimony, and feminine "soft skills"! Far away, in the middle of the deep blue sea, a utopia shall be built! A place devoted entirely to bold ingenuity and masculine ressourcefulness! A place that shall be known as….
The Isle of Cogs!

James W. Lee #crackpot #racist #ufo #magick #conspiracy

What if time is a cube on Saturn?

What if Earth is a torus that does not exist?

What if a person wants to comprehend that he must the square who study it the square?

What if Donald Trump ate Jesus?

What if Hitler ate Sugar?

What if Enoby Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way battled Chris-Chan Sonichu in the empire of Noregolia?

What if a white horse is not a horse?

What if a chicken is not a chicken but evil manifest?

What if it is gravity that is to blame for people falling in love?

What if the Bible was originally written in Voynichian?

What if The Tragedy of Khamlet, Son of the Emperor of Qo'noS was originally written in English?

What if I am God in the sense that my mind was copied and placed in the cybernetic system that contains the mind that can be called God?

Peter B. Meyer #crackpot #ufo #racist #magick #conspiracy

But what of Asterion, exiled last prince of Mu, slain in the prison in which his stepfather had him so cruelly entrapped? What of Orbatur Goldseeker, who turned his own world to gold yet still thirsts for more? What of the Secret Society of Secrets and the founding of New New Newtown? What of the godless love between headless women and dragons made out of motorcycles?

Donald J. Trump #wingnut

How do you do, fellow American Patriots? Rejoice, for I bring good tidings!
When our beloved Lord and Master shall return to His righteous place in the Oral Office, He shall degree that Christmas is to be replaced with Trumpmas, celebrating the incarnation of the True Messiah’s incarnation over two weeks!
Celebratory activities include:
- Chanting hymns to our Eternal President Donald John Trump
- Showing our gratitude to our generous Job Creators by performing a free shift every day
- Unboxing the yearly Trump NFT Trading Card
- Buying gifts for our glorious overlord, for both the Imperial Palace of Mar-a-Logo and for the secondary residence of the White House

Jim #wingnut #racist #conspiracy #sexist

What did Soros do to bring about the deaths of half a million Ukrainian Goyim?

Daemonic Vampyre Magick.

How did Soros make his money? (The official government answer will of course get your response silently deleted, unless accompanied by an explanation of why the answer given by us evil racist conspiracy theorists is wrong, which explanation has to reveal what us evil racist racist Hitler apologist racists say how Soros made his money)

He cleverly exploited arbitrage in the secret trade between the DeRo, the Bilderbuch Group and the Land of Nod.

What are the biological differences between blacks and whites, and why does this make it impractical for blacks and whites to live together under the same laws applying to them both equally?

The breath of blacks is rich in iron and sulfides, while the alkaline exhalations of whites are dominated by sulfates snd csrbonates. Thus, both groups need completely different Breathalyzer tests.

Why do women misbehave? Why are men and women not getting sex and family?

Men are from Venus, Women are from Mars.

Donald J. Trump #wingnut

Why no one talk about these extremely valuable artefacts of Lord-President Donald Trump?
- Freud’s Kettle of Logic
- Fifth Head of John the Baptist
- Benjamin Franklin’s Kite
- The Hands of Fate
- Ever-Accurate Map of the US Military
- Chekov’s Gun
- Ark of the Covetant

Raanra #wingnut #ufo #magick #conspiracy #mammon

What is the beauty of heaven?
What is the price of the priceless?
What did Alaska do with China’s money?
What is Rhisivalin?
What is the name of the mayor of Wesel?
And what’s the name of his wife?
And what’s the names of his children?

01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001
-- --- .-. ... .

Golden Hammer
Ring of Cicles
Brassiere of Eternal Flame.

Lisa Renee #crackpot #magick #ufo #conspiracy

Aue, in nomine nominis! Rejoice, ye children of the daughter of the father of the mother! In this cavalcade of cadence, by the power of celestial hell, into the fires of water we ride on hyperionic steeds of starry mist and stormy night! Behold, the proto-canid magister resides upon the instrument of cleansing, masticating! The tenebrous umbra of ebon darkness!

Wayne Allyn Root #conspiracy #wingnut

The many ways the Deep State has attempted to assassinate our glorious Lord and Master Donald Trump, and how he heroically foiled each of them:

- Soyifier
Donald Trump used a gold-wrought mirror to reflect the ray back at the operators, transforming their own flesh into tofu. They were subsequently eaten by their own vegan accomplices.

- Poisoning, attempt 1
Donald Trump recognised the smell of dihydrogenmonooxide and, in a brilliant slight of hands exchanged his cup with that of the mastermind of the attack at the headquarter of the CIA in Switzerland.

- Gayfrogzilla:
Donald Trump drew his huuuge sword as an ancient Bald Eagle raised by George Washington carried him into the air, where he killed the abomination with a single stab through the heart.

- Poisoning, attempt 2
Donald Trump proved completely immune to the mixture of 2,4,5-Trichlorophenoxyacetic acid, 2,4-Dichlorophenoxyacetic acid and 2,3,7,8-Tetrachlorodibenzo-p-dioxin used in the attempt, and indeed seems to be more vital than ever. The reasons for this are currently under investigation.

* Jewish Space Laser
Donald Trump detly dodged the laser and returned fire with a Colt Peacemaker formerly owned by Wyatt Earp and John Wayne, downing the satellite with a single shot from the hip.

- CommuNinjas
Donald Trump recognised the anticapitalist assassins from a mile away with his business instinct, and the weapons of martial Marxism - such as the hammer, the sickle, the Cuban Icepick, the Bulgarian Umbrella and the rubber dildo - proved no match for his skills in Bullshido and Gorilla Warfare taught to him by none other than Chuck Norris himself.

- The Tarrasque
Donald Trup fixated the immortal beast with a stubborn gaze of manly contempt, took one Planck tiem to centre himself, and then uttered a single sentence:
“You’re fired.”
Instantly, the indestructible dragon burst into black flame and died permanently.

Mike Adams the Health Ranger #wingnut #racist #transphobia #quack #conspiracy #mammon

- Tannhäuser announces great come-back tour.

- Muslim terrorist dies in attempt to climb Tower of Pizza.

- Avar Yakuza assassinates rock musician with mining drill.

- Necromancer cancelled over accusations of Wight Supremacy.

- Notorious Klabauter pirate completes grand raid across the oceans of the underside of the Flat Earth.

- Angel receives life-time ban from MacDonalds.

various commenters #wingnut #conspiracy

What I'd like to know is what muscle does Schwab have that his threats could be effective?

If my calculations are correct, the lower bound would be:
- one thousand two hundred thirty-four Men In Black
- twohundredtwelve Black Helicopter
- fourhundred twenty-one Black Volgas
- thirteen Stealth Giant Killer Robots
- ten wings of Khazarian Giant Gay Frog riders
- three Jewish Space Lasers
- one loaned strike force of Askaran Space Navy SEALs
- one colony of Tucker’s Kobolds
- one of each Chromatic Dragons
- six hundred threescore and six NinjaPirateZombieRobots
- six thousand bureau-wights
and last but certainly not least:
- forty Swiss War Chamoises

Congressman Paul Gosar & various commenters #wingnut

@DrPaulGosar Closing the borders is not enough. We can only hope the Republicans will have the balls to do what Eisenhower did: load illegals on trucks 24/7 and drive them back over the border. He got rid of 3 million parasites that way, and all of America was for it.

Naught but a cuckservative half-measure! No, there is only one option, one Final Solution: to blow up the land south of the Border. And I do not merely mean turning it into an irradiated wasteland throguh wide-area cobalt bombing. No, my modest proposal is to physically destroy the landmass itself.
And yes, those liberal elites and their so-called “science” may say that this is not feasible and that, if it were done, it would be utterly catastrophic on a scope far beyond the zone itself, resulting in not only in massive tsunamis across the coasts of the Atlantic and Pacific, an unprecedented impact winter and a complete disruption of global weather and oceanic systems, and almost certainly the extinction of humanity and along with almost all other complex life on Earth. But, friends, Americans, countrymen, what do these Communistic eggheads know? Nothing! And even if they were, as we all know, Freedom Ain’t Free. and as True Patriots, we all understand and are more than willing to pay the price of our sovereignity!

Marjorie Taylor Greene & various commenters #wingnut

various commenters #wingnut #racist

BastAnon names the Elites - by their True Names!
George Sauros
Queen Elizardbeth (dormant)
King Snarles
Hissary Clinton
Jörmungandr "Joe" Biden
Chameleon Harris
Boarrack Hissein Boama

Tim Rifat #magick #god-complex #psycho #crackpot

Is Tommy Wiseau a retired vampire hunter?

His background is shrouded in mystery due to the obscured nature of the secret world of the Occult and of the Vampire overlords especially. Vampires are exceedingly dangerous foes, making vampire hunting a very lucrative business for those who manage to survive – explaining his inexplicable wealth. His vampire-like mannerisms come from getting into the mindset of his prey, and perhaps, his retirement was forced by him experiencing early stages of being vampirically corrupted (although evidently, it did not progress to the point of not showing up on recordings… except, what if the expanses he spent on cameras alone were in truth in service of preparing it to prevent any such problems?). Unfortunately, years spent on the Hunt and in the secret world of the Occult have left him deeply disconnected from mortal society…

Tuella/Ashtar Command #ufo #magick #conspiracy

What is the true meaning of Kara Te?
What happened on so-called Mars?
Why do Black Holes say moo?
Does the Black Moon howl?

Gay Ghosts.
Gay Frogs.
Weapon of Gun.

Don’t feed the Plants!

Father Dabney #fundie #homophobia #transphobia

Retake everything!
Two boulders on a swing.
Do you hear the goblins sing?

I am my greatest fan.
Flight of the Puma-Man.
Who bought all the tan?

There will come a day,
When all will be blown away,
by the Maelstrom of Gay.

To the creek’s joint I drive,
In my BMW Five-Six-Five.

Donald J Trump & various commenters #wingnut

Can you imagine that I am constantly under investigation for “bullshit,” while Hunter Biden, whose Crimes are MANY, DEEP, fully documented on his Laptop from Hell (and elsewhere!), and often times directly involve his father,

Examples include, but are not limited to:
- Destroying the World’s Trade Center (Hicksville, Alabama, not to be confused with New York’s World Trade Center)
- Initiating Enoby Dark’ness Dementia Raven/Tara Way into Stanism and Goffikness
- Trafficking of the infamous toxin and drug Dihydrogenmonoxide
- The Clown Terror of 2016
- Genocide against Taured, Cryptoland and the Islamic Republic of Eastern Samothrace
- The theft of forty cakes. He took 40 cakes. That’s as many as four tens. And that’s terrible.

@tamerascott2166 #wingnut

This is a lie! Donald J. Trump is the first and the final, the prime and the ultimate, the one and only True President of the United States of America!

NEIOH via Family of Taygeta #ufo #magick

Science News:
“Homintor have a torso roughly in the shape of an oblong cuboid, segmented into (from rostral to caudal) a chest cavity protected by a bony cage, a soft abdomen only supported by fascia and the spinal collumn, and finally the bony pelvis.
The top of the torso bears a distinct ovoid head whose top is covered with ceratinous filament. Its ventral surface contains a pair of lenticular eyes, a long, roughly hemipyramidal nose ending in one pair of nostrils, and a horizontal mouth. Laterally, a pair of oval external ears are located.
Homintor possess two pairs of limbs, both of them share the same composition of two long segments followed by a shorter, broader structure, from which five appendages branch off, the most medial possessing two segments while the rest possess three. They are attached laterally at the caudal and rostal end of the body known as "hips" and "shoulders" respectively. The rostral pair are used for manipulation, whereas the lower pair serves the purpose of ambulation.
The most conspicuous differences between female and male Homin in a clothed state is that post-pubescent female specimens have an abdomen that is notably narrower than the chest and hips and a pair of roughly hemispherical mammaries (serving as display structures in mating) located ventrally on the chest.”
- Extract from the upcoming Anatomy and Cultures of Uncontacted Sapients, Sultoroch Gastralanto et al., Tyralinga University Press.

In other news:
- Askaran Freedom Council confirms Space Navy SEAL raid on XylarTech facility.
- Healthcare authorities warn against DIY brain implants.
- Atmospheric conditions in outer space continue to interfere with transmitting.

Helen Lim and Jay-R Cimatu/Ismael Perez #ufo #magick #conspiracy

By the w0nders of zhe higher dimensions,
A third side of the disk appears!

1.23 Sequencing The Sequence Of Sequences
2.22 Loose
3.14159 Slightly More Than A Pie
4.44 Each Of The Quartet Gains One
5.00 Multitude
6:18 Reptilian Immortality
7.77 Beyond the Seven Mountains
08.15 The Generic
11.11 The Season of Fools
13.31 The Mirror of Misfortune
19.99 Leviathon
20.15 Prime Time
25.25 If Man Is Still Alive
27.18 Gltr wert gfdserqwts esgjutzrw
29.59 How Do You Do?
30.00 How Do I Do What?
33:33 Thirty-Three
37.91 Master Of The Tori
42.00 The Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything,

Cobra/The Portal #ufo #magick #conspiracy #crackpot

Science News:
“Homintor have a torso roughly in the shape of an oblong cuboid, segmented into (from rostral to caudal) a chest cavity protected by a bony cage, a soft abdomen only supported by fascia and the spinal collumn, and finally the bony pelvis.
The top of the torso bears a distinct ovoid head whose top is covered with ceratinous filament. Its ventral surface contains a pair of lenticular eyes, a long, roughly hemipyramidal nose ending in one pair of nostrils, and a horizontal mouth. Laterally, a pair of oval external ears are located.
Homintor possess two pairs of limbs, both of them share the same composition of two long segments followed by a shorter, broader structure, from which five appendages branch off, the most medial possessing two segments while the rest possess three. They are attached laterally at the caudal and rostal end of the body known as "hips" and "shoulders" respectively. The rostral pair are used for manipulation, whereas the lower pair serves the purpose of ambulation.
The most conspicuous differences between female and male Homin in a clothed state is that post-pubescent female specimens have an abdomen that is notably narrower than the chest and hips and a pair of roughly hemispherical mammaries (serving as display structures in mating) located ventrally on the chest.”
- Extract from the upcoming Anatomy and Cultures of Uncontacted Sapients, Sultoroch Gastralanto et al., Tyralinga University Press.

Kevin Sorbo #fundie

Santa is an alien.
He can go to so many houses worldwide in such a short time because his sled is actually a time-travelling FTL spaceship.
His diminuitive "elves" are actually Little Green Men.
He lives on a spacestation in a stable orbit above the North Pole and may be from Polaris.
He uses chimneys because they, being based on Tartarian technology, are actually perfect conduits for his transport technology.
And he can create any present because he has replicators, and even branded products because his species already has NESARA!
WAKE UP SHEEPLE!

Dmitry Medvedev & Elon Musk #dunning-kruger #wingnut

Was Barrack Obama truly born in Khazaria?
Did Ashtar Sheran just buy a Tesla?
Has mountaineering peaked?
Who ate the cannibals?

Invisible Fish in the cave.
Lovecraft in New Swabia.
Soviet bears in space.

I am a toaster.
And all toasters toast toast.

Kerry Cassidy/Gene Decode #wingnut #conspiracy #ufo #magick #crackpot

Deep Below The Earth: Donnie’s Little Brother
Prisons and Pegasi: The Power of the Polyhedra
Harry Jacobson - Mad Genealogist!
Zorro’s Aster and the Isle of View
The Doom That Came Whence Liberty Dwelt
Ronnie Raygun and the Marx-Man
Cat Scholar From Outer Space
The Reverend Werewolf
Lesbian Lizard’s Lazy Lust
The Adventures of Thor Han and Loki Luke
In the Court of the Boggard-King
The Strange Case of Sir Robert and Mister Hyde
Flying Squids in the Tenebrous Dome of Tiamat

David Chase Taylor #crackpot #conspiracy #wingnut

Taylor Swift Plans Concert on Guam

The decision was made after an analysis revealed that nearly two third of views from her videos originated from the island.
"It seems like it's the home of my Number One Fan", the singer explained.
She continued that she looks forward to enjoy Guam's tropical beaches.

In Other News:
- Xenu DCLXVI Continues Hyades Tour
- Wolpertinger Foils Terrorist Attack
- Florida Man Contracts Rabies From Opossum Roadkill - Vastly Increased Mental Health!

James Red Pills America #wingnut #conspiracy #fundie #quack

What do we do with the drunken sailor?
Where is the Bathtub of Detiny?
Why they did this to you not me?

A time to be born, a time to die,
A time to plant, a time to reap,
A time to kill, a time to heal,
A time to dance below purple sky.

The Gate and the Key.
The Bird and the Bee.
The Axe and the Tree.
The Tax and the Fee.

Tuarid.

KatAnon/Juan O Savin #wingnut #conspiracy

Gooseberry fields lie hallow
As the Dragon goes to rest.
The knight’s pleas ring hollow,
The safeguard put to a test.

One day the fish shall fly
Across fungus forest sky
Yet now the days goy by
Sometimes good, oft awry.

The roads go ever on and on,
But so does the Redcaps’ rage.
Will their lord soon have gone
To simmer in cold iron cage?

Storm Rider #wingnut #crackpot #conspiracy

Who destroyed the Earth?
Who killed suicide god?
Who is the True Scotsman?

Necessary is Disinformation.
A babby is formed.
Down, down to Goblin Town.

7x7.
5d5 D.
(0/0)².

Evilistic.

Jerry Derecha/AlphaDraconianOrionCaduceusAdrenochromeHarvesting #magick #ufo #crackpot #conspiracy

Jerry Derecha = Delicious Jelly = Kara Te = I Surrender Myself To Zen Buddhism = Cuckservative = Falling Well = Perpetual Motion = Emergy Freedom = America = Ammonium Hydrogencarbonate = Adenochrome = Lemon Drops = Albus Dumbledore = Gay Frog = God’s Holy Righteous Penis = Chad Thundercock = Thor = Jane Foster = Calamity Jane = The Disaster Artist = Vampire Cavemen On Mars = Barrack Obama = Karl Marx = Charlemagne = Roland = Princess Paladina = Miles Gloriosus = Donald Trump = Biff = Marty McFly = Ebony = Black Lives Matter = Black Holes = Relativity = Relativism = Relatives = Mafia = Stupor Mundi = Pyramid Earth = Vespuccist Dogma = Atlantis = Leviathon

Lisa Renee #crackpot #magick #ufo #fundie #conspiracy

Celestial Succubus Stacy Lovehard in Yuggothised hierodoulous union with Judas Cain, Chosen for Damnation! The ascension of Black Midi Diadem Sylver Goldruby is imminent! Blue beams of orange light, juggling songs of garnet garment and Gaulish Ghouls, synergised by Mother Unborn! Palaxiral-gyr-taraxil!