“Recently I felt my heart open up toward my son, but I started to think maybe I should try using his new name.”
Since this is Pittfucks, I must assume you mean ‘daughter’ and ‘her’ new name. And you need to do more than ‘try,’ bitch.
"After discussing with my therapist, I realized that once again I was taking on responsibility and trying to fix it”
Yeah, your heart’s really opening as you keep framing the change as a problem, a mistake, a delusion.
"I can however, work on keeping my heart open and loving him from afar.”
That’s probably good. You can love the idea of him-that-was without any uncomfortable scenes of actually talking to her.
"I can practice compassion toward him, toward myself, and toward everyone caught up or affected by transgenderism.”
That’s not compassion. I mean, it’s the right word, but you still see it as fake, overall. It’s like the parent of a kid in an interracial relationship waiting for them to ‘come to their senses.’
“I have observed that it seems the majority of those who are keeping contact are doing so for financial reasons.”
OR maybe their parents, loved ones, are NOT self-centered fucksticks? Just a thought.
"My son broke all financial ties before coming out. Therefore, he had nothing financially to lose by going no contact.”
Sounds like she knew you were going to be a twat and made sure you have no leverage.
“This may sound harsh, but I think it’s the cold hard reality for many.”
You seem to select your reality from a catalog, ensuring that you don’t pick anything that might compromise your attitudes.
“I stand here in the light, ready to help my son.”
You stand here in a spotlight you trained on yourself.
And you’re only ready to ‘help’ if she completely capitulates to your truth. That’s not help. You’re making reconciliation transactional.
“But helping is not reinforcing the delusion or doing anything to make it easier for him to live this lifestyle.”
Yep.All the compassion of a trebuchet, with her in the bucket.
"I look at it like enabling an alcoholic”
Lucky for you that there’s a model for withholding love and support and calling it a good thing.
"I can’t control an adult’s drinking but I sure as hell can control not buying him booze.”
Sounds like she’s smart enough not to ask you for any.