Remember how Obama was going to take away your teddy guns and make you gay-marry your turtle?
Somehow that didn’t happen from 2008 to 2016. Didn’t happen the last time a Democrat was president, either. Or the time before that one, or the time before THAT one. But as a direct result of your ongoing trauma over having a black man in the white house, you DID manage to elect a mobbed-up con artist and crappy reality TV star who then proceeded to gut the government, crater the economy, get a quarter of a million people killed for no good reason, burned as many of our relationships with other countries as he could find, and now has dedicated himself to remaining in office in spite of the fact that a good chunk of the country rightfully wants him gone. So you’ve got that going for you, which is nice.
PS: there’s no need to microchip you, because you’re willingly carrying around a combination communication system/tracking device with you literally everywhere you go, and you’re practically unable to take part in normal, everyday society nowadays unless you do. Mark of the Beast? Relax, you’re soaking in it.