kuyohashi

@kuyohashi

Michael Baxter #crackpot #conspiracy #wingnut

“And then GodKing Trump will track down Debbie Hawson, the snobby little bitch who turned me down in junior high, and force her to go to prom with me, and the football team will get stuffed into lockers, and my dad will finally be proud of me, and then I'll go for a ride in the car from Knight Rider! And everything will be wonderful someday!”

*Sigh!* These people are fucking exhausting.

Ryushin Malone #crackpot #ufo #conspiracy #racist

@Volcheka1 #84514

Obviously they mean that the death march is in the shape of Orion of New Genesis, son of dread Darkseid, warhound of Apokalips and master of the Astro Force. I just thought that was implicit.

Martin Luther King Jr. via Erena Velazquez #crackpot #conspiracy #fundie #magick

Iamnothere000 #psycho #sexist

guanoloco #homophobia #wingnut

@JeanP #83753

How do you leave Hubbard's Hilarious House of Hoodoo and yet still believe that alien ghosts make you do the evil? Did they just transition from getting their thetans measured to only having full-blown schizophrenia?

OT, speaking as someone with both crippling thalasso- and acrophobia, I promise that calling homophobes, “homophobes,” in no way, shape or form offends me. What does offend me is someone deigning to use me and others with phobias (you know, most of the human race) to defend their choice to be assholes. Why don't you go make like Saint Lafayette and pound rocks in the ocean. Maybe you'll do better than he did.

Fr. Frank Pavone #fundie #wingnut

Padre, the only way Dotard Dribbles could ever love you is if you put on an Ivanka wig and wore that slinky dress he likes so much. Otherwise, you're a just-barely useful idiot, and he already has Eric.

Anubis via Erena Velazquez #crackpot #ufo #magick #conspiracy #wingnut

@Skyknight #83314

Isn't Nephthys his mother, though?

Interesting that Anubis would use the Greek version of his name, rather than the proper, Egyptian Anpu. Almost like somebody who got their Egyptology degree from watching Scooby Doo cartoons and just started making up some Chariots of the Gods pigshit to grift money from delusion idiots and/or try to make themselves feel "speh-shull” or something.

Medeea Greere #crackpot #conspiracy #wingnut #psycho

Anyone else remember that jackass who wrote an actual for-sale novel about Obama's blubbering, tantrum-filled arrest for the capital offense of PWB? This is that, but with more peyote buttons.

Linus #psycho #sexist

Wouldn't it just be easier to, you know, work on yourself, you sad, sick fuck?

Henry Makow, PhD #crackpot #conspiracy #wingnut #sexist #homophobia #kinkshaming

Playboy never made you do literal jack shit, Makow. You had the propensity for objectification before you touched one glossy page, and the fact that you think women should be relegated solely to baby-chutes and sandwich presses only serves to show that you STILL objectify women.

Also, every time you demonize Jews, Jesus tosses another iron ingot onto Hell's furnace, warming it up for your bunghole when you finally get down there. That's his Momma you're talking about, fucker.

Peter B. Meyer #conspiracy #ufo #fundie #magick #crackpot

@Thraxas #82342

If they're capable of interplanetary travel, then it's likely they would be capable of nuclear fusion, in which case, they can just fucking manufacture gold without having to bother with enslaving anyone.

Also, this:

…long levity

So shit like this really is all just a big joke?

Varg Vikernes #crackpot #fundie #racist

Cool story, brah. Except that Odin viewed all humans are fit only to serve, he said as much during the hallucination sequences. Which, gotta be honest, I only finished post-game. Asgard, much like Odyssey's Atlantis DLC, was just a dull slog through an uninteresting-but-pretty locale full of people I didn't care to get to know.

Also, the whole thing with the Jotnar, that confused me. If the Aesir are Isu, and humans are humans, what the hell were the Jotnar? Were they a different clan of Isu? A different thing altogether? I mean, they must have been Isu, right? Since Hyrrokin turned out to be fucking Juno of all people, right? Gah, Assassin's Creed lore gives me cancer sometimes.

Anyway, dunno who this fuckmumple is, probably not anyone important, and fuck him, fuck his Odin, fuck his Bor, fuck his Aesir and Vanir, fuck his beliefs and fuck his lily-white inbred ass from here to Svartalfheim. I'm sure he'll love it there.

Brian Niemeier #wingnut #conspiracy #mammon #racist

Edward Smith #fundie #dunning-kruger

For what it's worth, the'd probably be more like seals, flopping about on flippers.

As for a “lack of knowledge of biology,” dolphins still have their fucking phalanges (finger bones). We know they used to be terrestrial, ffs.

Candace Owens #homophobia #sexist #dunning-kruger

Once again, Candace bitches about things nobody has ever said.

Craig R. Brittain #wingnut #psycho

I hope everybody buckled up, because that swerve could cause whiplash.

Michael Baxter #conspiracy #wingnut

Name: Mike Pence. Profession: Store Front Mannequin and milk enthusiast. Destination: Death Row, Gitmo. Mike Pence has been tried and convicted for doing his damned job and letting an election be certified in the winner's favour. But laws are made by men, carried out by men. And men are imperfect. Mike Pence is innocent. Proved guilty, what Mike Pence could not prove was that moments before saving democracy just by standing by like a goober, he encountered a man running from the reality that he was beaten by a guy from fucking Scranton. A man with orange skin. A man he had wished he had never seen before. A man who has not yet conceded his defeat. Mike Pence ponders his fate as he looks at the world for the last time. And sees only darkness. But in that darkness, fate moves its huge hand.

The Fugitive, a QM Production, starring Race Bannon as Mike Pence, an innocent victim of blind ignorance, falsely convicted for failing to fellate the god-emperor sufficiently, reprieved by fate when a train wreck of a presidency freed him en route to the political death house; freed him to hide in lonely desperation, to change his identity, to toil at many jobs; freed him to search for an orange-skinned man he saw leave the scene of the crime; freed him to run before the relentless pursuit of the QAnon shamans obsessed with his capture.

Michael Jackson via Erena Velazquez #crackpot #magick #conspiracy

Man, I wish my moral compass were broken, so I could scam money out of these morons.

“Hi there, I'm the ghost of Prince! Ignore the fat white guy I’m wearing, it's wash day. Man, I sure could use your PIN number, you know, to prevent the lizard people of Alpha Centauri Six from stealing humanity’s thoughts. Only with your donation can I purchase enough aluminum to cover the entire world and protect us all from evil space rays of indeterminate religious origins! Trump 2357!”

If only I didn't have that niggling little conscience keeping me from full-blown sociopathy, I'd be rolling in bank. Being good sucks.

PETA #psycho

Someone remind me again, how are these peons in any way, shape or form, “ethical?”

Bill Mitchell #wingnut #conspiracy

I'm not sure who Bill Mitchell is, but he sounds like an absolute cabbage.

James Rink #crackpot #conspiracy #ufo #magick

Benjamin Fulford #crackpot #conspiracy #racist #quack

Benjy Fulford would have been amazing at creating Saturday morning cartoons back in the 80's. He would have succumbed to a massive cocaine addiction by 1989 and his death would have been such a critical blow to the drug industry that Columbia would have to become a vassal state to the US just to survive, but he'd have been awesome while he was still alive.

OverwroughtDoeling #conspiracy #crackpot

@Creativerealms #81049

Granted, I've heard it's better than it has any right to be, certainly better than shit like An American Carol, the God’s Not Dead series or that one bit of fuckery Kevin Sorbo did about how the eeeeeeevil libruls took all the freedoms and now the only thing that can save ‘Murca is family, Jesus and guns. Still, however polished a turd might be, a turd it shall remain.

Fritz Berggren #fundie #racist #conspiracy #homophobia

Jesus’ mom was the Nazarene bicycle who slam-fucked every slave at the drunken barn dance and couldn't tell you who her babydaddy was if her life depended on it. Out of sheer mind-breaking panic, she concocted a bullshit story about angels and divine proclamations, knowing that her geriatric husband was just barely literate enough to comprehend language and would believe her bullshit, thereby sparing her a post-natal stoning. In order to complete the ruse, she raised the child in the lie, thereby warping him into actually thinking he was some sort of Bronze-Aged superhero. He had managed to get just enough education to be charismatic, and like any good cult leader, accrued followers; however, his insanity threatened to bring the wrath of Rome down upon the Jewish vassal states, and in order to prevent the Legate's massacre of the Israelites, the Pharisees had Jesus handed over to Pilate for execution, which Pilate did. And then Jesus stayed dead because he was just the crazy son of a whore, and not actually magic.

Is that offensive?

OverwroughtDoeling #conspiracy #crackpot

Ben Shapiro made Die Hard in High School and it was nothing more than Second Amendment fellatio about how the only real solution to gun violence was more gun violence. Face it, even the MCu is more rooted in reality than anything the GOP could come up with. But then again, they aren't the most imaginative lot in the first place, are they?

Conspiracy Theories Archives #ufo #conspiracy

@arp #80844

Oh they couldn't possibly, they stopped at the deli for some knish on the way over and they get gassy if they eat too much.

Oh, why not, maybe a bit of nosh, some matzo or a nice piece of fish if you've got it, but they don't want to put you out or anything.

Got high, watched the MST3K episode with The Deadly Mantis, got confused. Guarantee it.

JonFreeman #wingnut

It's funny, I actually trust Christian Conservatives about as far as I can throw them, and I'm a fat man with arthritis and a cane, so…that's not far. I just can't seem to trust someone with my life, when they think letting me die, or even helping me die, will net them ethereal brownie points with a vaguely-defined Canaanite war-god.

JonFreeman #wingnut #racist

Mad props to Bastethotep for confronting this asshole to his virtual face, and I love how Freefall's only response was basically, “You only have two followers, so your point can't possibly be valid!”

Fuck this newt, you got three followers now, Bast.

Lauren Boebert, US Representative for CO District 3 #fundie #wingnut #conspiracy

She pretends like it hasn't been the GOP endgame since President Black Guy was a thing, all to make sure President Black Guy 2: The Re-Melanining doesn't happen. She's just pissy that it's not her party taking the oligarchy. Her side stacks the deck so that only they benefit, only they get power, and only so they can have it, never so they can do anything with it, then bitches and whines about the other side trying to balance shit out. Fuck this gaslighting bitch.

James Rink #crackpot #conspiracy #magick #ufo

Bennett Lee Ross #crackpot #conspiracy #quack #ufo

Bennett Lee Ross #crackpot #conspiracy #ufo #magick

@arp #80066

Damn, I was using medical knowledge culled by humans through lifetimes of study and experience, when I should have just left out a bowl of milk and asked any shoe-making brownies that happened by!

Charlie Kirk #transphobia #wingnut

I would have thought Charlie Kirk would be glad to see fewer books being read by children; reading leads to thinking, and if more people are thinking, then they're not listening to his brain-melting drivel.

Curious.

Unveiling Them #fundie #crackpot #psycho #wingnut #quack

Gee, I wonder what group of (((people))) this ass-huffer is referring to? They're just so clever and subtle, I can't seem to decipher their brilliant code. /s

Lauren Boebert, US Representative for CO District 3 #fundie #wingnut #conspiracy #crackpot

@The_Crimson_Ghost #80137

Ooh, think we can get Liz Chaney's dad to invite her on a hunting trip? He knows how to do this shit.

Bennett Lee Ross #crackpot #conspiracy #ufo #magick

@Bastethotep #79955

And adrenochrome will, at best, give you a nasty headache akin to a post-workout rush, and at worst put you into a dissociative psychotic fugue.

But do keep up with your scintillating “exposes," Benny. And remember, citing reliable and real sources is for lizard people, so never do it!

Lauren Boebert, US Representative for CO District 3 #fundie #wingnut #racist #conspiracy

@Timjer #80020

Um, er, ah…her emails! Obama's real birth certificate! Sleepy Joe! Look over there at what the Dems are doing! Nothing happening over here, no siree! Pay no attention to the fat reality star behind the curtain!

Did I do that right, Q-Berts?

Unknown 4chan Poster #pratt #transphobia

@WhiteNoise #78928

I got you.
image

Nong Toom, the first - but not the last - trans muay thai boxer. She'd give this ape his first semi-chub, then break it in half with her knee, and he'd beg for another.

OT, firstly, while passing is important, I imagine it's secondary to the sense of wholeness a transperson would feel, finally being in the right skin. I cannot and would never deign to speak for a life experience I will never have, but given everything in equal measure, there are more important things than looking like Morgan fucking Fairchild to consider.

Second, you ain't fooling anybody, son. I guaran-fucking-tee you've got eighty terabytes of Bailey Jay squirrelled away somewhere, probably wedged between your Natalie Mars collection and the Joanna Jett ouvre. As they say, the squeaky wheel wants to get greased.

Lauren Boebert, US Representative for CO District 3 #fundie #wingnut #crackpot

“Your Honour, the police have tagged my client as a criminal by arresting them and charging them for crimes they have been accused of committing, with evidence to back the charges up! In light of all this damning evidence against my client, how can they ever receive a fair trial?”

Bennett Lee Ross #crackpot #conspiracy #quack #ufo

Man, these opening text crawls for the new Star Wars films are getting more and more esoteric and less on topic. Benny, it's like Luke said, man; "stay on target.” You're all over the place with your story ideas, how are you going to get anything coherent out of this if you just keep tossing things into the fantasy kitchen sink?

@Bastethotep #78731

To my embarrassment, I honestly thought he was being literal about star forts, then I remembered I had played AoE3 and should have known better.

David J. Stewart #fundie #crackpot

TEA_PARTY_PATRIOT #crackpot #dunning-kruger #ufo #wingnut

Profit #conspiracy #racist

That's a long way to go just to say you hate Irish people, moron.

Red Youth #moonbat #psycho #dunning-kruger

I promise you this person is working on a dating sim where they try to rehabilitate history's greatest monsters. Something akin to the Colonel Sanders game, but with more Pol Pot.

And they're making the game with only one hand.

Bennett Lee Ross #crackpot #conspiracy #quack #magick #ufo

Have you tried putting it to music, Ben? Maybe it won't suck nearly as much if you put it to a throbbing electrohouse beat, maybe have Skrillix drop the base just when you start mentioning the lizard-people and cloned slave workforce toiling away in the sugar mines of Mars?

Conservapedia #fundie #conspiracy #wingnut

Jesus Buttery Fuck, they actually claim in the same “article” that Biden has both increased police powers and somehow let crime run rampant by defunding the police. They actually had the balls to imply, with a fucking picture of Joe and his kid at a Redskins game, that their presence at said game led to the team changing their name after folks realized it was racist. Andrew, what fecking reality do you live in, you fucking moron?

One Million Moms #fundie #homophobia #conspiracy

Conservative parents are outraged!

And water is wet, what else is new?

American Girl could have chosen another storyline or characters to write about and remained neutral in the culture war.

Except you want them to pretend gay people don't exist, which would be taking your side in the so-called culture war. And that's the real sticking point - they're disagreeing with you. Well, how dare they, amirite?

Judy Byington #conspiracy #wingnut #psycho

200 miles of tunnels generates a lot of displaced soil. Where'd it go? Why didn't anyone question why they were building such massive tunnels across the country? It would have been impossible to dig these tunnels in secret, someone would have noticed it.

Lisa Renee #crackpot #ufo #magick #conspiracy

*Reads this insanity, furiously taking down notes*
Think she'll sue me when I turn this nonsense into an anime?