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One of the most quoted verses from the Bible is Matthew 7:1 "Judge not!" Whenever someone speaks out against something that God calls sin, "Don't judge!" can be heard coming from a thousand lips. People don't like to have other people disapprove of the way they're choosing to live their life.

I will speak to you a hard truth. I do not write this because I think that it will bring me popularity. It won't. But it is Truth from the Word of God: the Bible.
To not tell people this is to hide the truth from them. To keep silent is to not care for their eternal destiny! I care about you, and this is why I am speaking out!

In this world, people have seared their consciences. The standard of what is "ok" or "permissible" in our society today, hardly reflects God's standard.
People are content to live on in lying, cursing, pride, anger, bitterness, disrespecting of parents, lust, pornography, fornication, adultery, and other sexual sins-- and if anyone tries to confront them, their attitude and response is, "You live your life, I'll live mine. Don't you tell me what to do! Only God can judge me!"
They don't even realize what they're saying. God's judgement isn't something to be taken lightly! It should scare you! Man's "judgement" is a 1000x lighter... usually just a voicing of disapproval. But when unbelieving, sinful men die and stand before God, He justly condemns them to hell.

But people disregard the Bible, and instead use all kinds of human logic to try to justify their way of living:

Person #1: "I've been living this lifestyle for years, and I'm a 'Christian.' I don't feel that God is angry with me. I believe in a loving God, not one who would send people to hell."
The person speaking this is right-- their god is not angry with them. He can't be, because he doesn't exist. They are not talking about the God of the Bible. They have created a god in their own mind to suit themselves. They have removed any notion of the Justice of God, and have created a god of their imagination that they can be comfortable with.
The Bible teaches that God is a Just Judge, and He must punish sin. Every one of us have broken God's law, and hell is our deserved punishment. (Unless you're reading some very distorted "translation" of the Bible, you cannot get around the fact that there is a hell).

Person #2: "I have a 'peace' about this, and I'm listening to my heart. God doesn't seem to be judging me. If God didn't approve, why wouldn't He strike me dead right now?"
First off, our human hearts are bent toward sin and not righteousness. We shouldn't follow the inclinations of our heart, but rather we know what is right and wrong according to what we find in God's Word: the Bible.
Secondly, God isn't slacking to fulfill His promised Judgement on sin--it's coming. And the only reason you're are alive right now is because He is merciful and has kept your heart beating for another day. He is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish but that all should reach repentance. But He will not hold back forever. The hours of your time here on earth are ticking away. You're not promised another day, or even another breath. God's Day of Judgement draws near. It will come as a thief in the night--when you least expect it. Everything that you have done in secret will be exposed. Nothing we do is hidden from God's view. (1 Peter 3:9&10)

This should be concerning to you. I know it was for me! When I saw myself in light of God's standard, and I knew that I fell short. But I found hope in the Gospel-- the "good news" of Jesus Christ! I would still be lost today were it not for His grace!

Read what God has done so that you and I might be forgiven of our sins and saved from the punishment we deserve:

16 "For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life.
17 For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through Him.
18 Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only Son of God.
19 And this is the judgment: the light has come into the world, and people loved the darkness rather than the light because their works were evil.
20 For everyone who does wicked things hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his works should be exposed.
21 But whoever does what is true comes to the light, so that it may be clearly seen that his works have been carried out in God."
John 3:16-21

Repent! Turn away from sin, and to Jesus Christ today! Be saved from the wrath to come.

The believing man has Christ's perfect record put to their account.
God gives him a new heart and new desires.
If you find yourself a sinner in need of Jesus, then open your Bible today and begin to read the books of John and Romans. Let the Word of God root out the sins of your heart. Do not let up until you have found Salvation for your soul!

"How do you explain to unbelievers who think that God is hateful etc, the 'violence' and 'slavery' in the Old Testament, that God is loving, just, kind etc?" Jo Lee

This is a hill upon which to die, particularly for the atheist. The argument is that if God can be proven to be evil, then He has no right to judge the world on Judgment Day. If he can prove that God is wicked, then in his own mind, he can justify his darling sins--pornography, lust, fornication, adultery, homosexuality, etc.

It is because he is secretly trying to cover his sins that you will rarely give him an answer with which he agrees. Seldom will you hear, "Wow! I never knew that. That's very helpful. Thank you. I will now seek after God and soften my heart to the gospel."

If you explain the slavery issue he will run to the issue of violence in the Old Testament (or in the New Testament). If you expound the fact that God is extremely violent in His passion for justice, and that “every one of His judgments are righteous and true altogether," you can be sure he will ask about God not healing amputees, or ask who it was who "made" God.

You must keep clear the commission given to you by Jesus--to preach the gospel to every creature. You are not called to defend the character of God any more than a prosecutor needs to defend the character of a judge to a depraved criminal. God's not the one who will be on trial on Judgment Day. He is, so make sure you don’t run down every rabbit trail that he’s designed to take you away from the issue at hand.

For the sake of the person to whom you are speaking, you have to turn the spotlight off the morally perfect Judge. Then you have to turn it onto the deluded, sin-loving, self-deceiving, self-righteous guilty and depraved sinner, who has the insane impudence and outrageous audacity to point his crooked holier-than-thou finger at Almighty God, and accuse Him of sin.

The crazy irony is that if you ask for specificity as what violent acts God supposedly committed, he will probably point to the Noah flood and say that God "drowned” millions of babies. That's when you ask him if the incident really happened. If he says it did, then, as an atheist, he's saying that God is real and He did send the Noah flood. So he's blown his cover—he’s not an atheist. This is exactly what is said in Romans chapter one. Every human being intuitively knows the Creator exists.

If he holds onto to his atheism and says that God doesn't exist and the Bible is full of myths, then why is he upset? There was no flood and no babies drowned. That's like someone being upset because Cinderella’s fairy godmother turned the coach back into a pumpkin because she didn't get back by midnight.

You started the game, so you call the play. Never forget that. When you want to share the gospel with someone you believe in heading for Hell, don't let him go where they want you to go. If he has a sincere question, answer it, but do so with one eye on the cross. That's where you are heading. If you are not sure how to answer questions asked by the unsaved, you will find 200 of the most commonly asked questions in "The Evidence Bible."