kuyohashi

@kuyohashi

Bennett Lee Ross #crackpot #ufo #magick #conspiracy

Does he mix crushed mushrooms into his morning coffee? How the hell does the human brain get so broken that this string of nonsense becomes de rigueur?

FAKE NEWS for the Zionist agenda #racist #wingnut #conspiracy

"JIMMY, THE COMPUTER'S DOING THAT THING WITH THE BIG LETTERS AGAIN!!”
“*Sigh!* Grampa, did you press the Caps Lock key again?”
“I DON'T KNOW, I THINK THE JEWS PRESSED IT TO MAKE ME LOOK STUPID!”
“Grampa, that shit isn't cool, knock it off with the Nazi stuff, okay? Mom said if you don't, then I can't come over to help you look up pictures of German lady wrestlers stepping on turtles anymore."
“DID I EVER TELL YOU ABOUT THE TIME I SAW HEDY LEMARR STEP ON A PEACH? THAT DAME HAD FEETS, LET ME TELL YOU!”
“On second thought, maybe Mom has the right idea.”

Candace Owens #conspiracy #fundie #wingnut

But only (in Minecraft), right Candy? Wouldn't want to possibly incite actual violence, and then go through all the trouble of feigning innocence, would we?

Prussian Society of America #racist

I imagine Melvin's thought processes during a conversation with anyone else would go like this:

Other person: *Speaks their native language*
Melvin (thinking): Ugh! They're speaking Foreign again. I only listen to the Kaiser's German, peasant, like a real man.

Then he fixes his fedora firmly in place, and with a sweep of his trenchcoat, is off again to point out how his dead empire is somehow better than the nations that built themselves upon it's bones.

Stonetoss #wingnut #conspiracy #crackpot #dunning-kruger #mammon

On behalf of art, I take offense to you calling what you puke onto your Wacom as “art.” Andy Warhol is art. Da Vinci is art. Yoshitaka Amano is art. George Perez is art. You, you sad piddling prat, are to art what bathroom graffiti is to James Joyce and the long-form epic poem. I imagine that your villain origin story is, some girl, or black guy, or gay guy, or triumvirate of said people, did or said something you took umbrage with, most likely mere dint of their existence, and having no other outlet for your impotent fury at their “otherness,” opted instead to take cartooning out behind the woodshed and re-enact scenes from Deliverance upon it's fetid corpse. When your opinion is “these people should not be allowed to live, and I would gladly bludgeon them to death with the raging stiffy the very thought of killing them gives me,” then no, duckfucker, your opinion should not be shared and your works should be tossed into the deepest hole in the internet's darkest oubliette.

Jelaila Starr/Nibiruan Council #ufo #magick #crackpot

@Sasha #105731

Shit, I missed that. My Caitian admiral in STO looks normal-sized, guess she must be a runt or something. Probably not one of the 9D breed, I guess.

Clif High #crackpot #conspiracy #wingnut #dunning-kruger

It is a fact that Biden takes bribes from the CCP who are selling Uighur organs into the global medical marketplace, including ‘fresh harvested’ from both prime adult and CHILDREN ‘specimens’.

Present your evidence, then we'll take you seriously. Otherwise, pull your pants up and stop talking out your ass.

But this is not true to the progressive or wokian.

Or to anyone else living in “reality.”

It is only a factual ‘lie’.

Agreed. you claiming all of this is a lie. Factually, you are lying. It is, in fact, a lie. Very good, gold star, 10/10, no notes.

Jelaila Starr/Nibiruan Council #ufo #magick #crackpot

…What game? Is it that weird board game from DS9 that Jumanji'd people into actual danger? Or that Russian Roulette-style game from Alien Nation that threatened to spray corrosive-to-the-aliens seawater into the player's face at random? I mean, the whole thing about Caitians being real is bonkers-in-pants enough, but I'm stuck on “the universe is a really big game of Candyland.”

Occult World #magick

*Starts furiously taking notes*

Shit, this is good stuff. If I ever finally do get into D&D, I think I've got the bones of some good worldbuilding right here. I should touch this up on my Worldanvil so it's not quite so “eat colloidal silver to stop leprechauns from stealing your eyelashes”-ish, though.

@arp #105703

…You do you, chere. No pun intended.

Herbanomic.com #quack #crackpot #mammon

@arp #105699

And the silver. Why the silver?

To keep those pesky werewolves from taking our precious bodily fluids, of course.

I've forgotten a fair bit of my biology classes, but I am pretty certain that DNA can't transmit information so much as it simply is information.

As for the whole “deliver much-needed oxygen and hydrogen to your immune system,” you can do that just by drinking water.

Ron Johnson #fundie #homophobia #conspiracy

Fauci did the exact same thing with AIDS. He overhyped it (…) He created all kinds of fear, saying it could affect the entire population when it couldn’t.

Weird. Why didn't he just consult the reams of data and centuries of research we had on AIDS and HIV, which naturally would have been gathered from the very dawn of time? What's that? New virus, nobody knew what it could do, how it transmitted, or who exactly was susceptible?

And he’s doing, he’s using the exact same playbook with COVID, ignoring therapy, pushing a vaccine

See previous statement vis-a-vis the novelty of the virus and the lack of information on it. He's doing the best he can, trying to keep the plates of society spinning, while you fucks whine about every little inconvenience asked of you to save lives. He'll make mistakes, but he's still far more trustworthy than chugging dewormer.

Oh, and on that point…

There is literally nothing in an anti-parasitic that would have any affect on any invasive vector that isn't a parasite. It doesn't work on bacteria or viruses, it only works on parasites. Using ivermectin on a virus is like expecting aspirin to cure a diabetic coma - what fucking chemical mechanism is supposed to be at work there? Learn chemistry, take some biology, do some actual fucking sciencing before you open your damned fool mouth, or sit down, shut up, and listen to the man who went to actual fucking medical school.

Fucking clowns.

Charlie Kirk #conspiracy #fundie #wingnut

Prussian Society of America #sexist #conspiracy #homophobia #transphobia #racist

Of course Melvin hates smart women. They see through his bullshit.

Liz Wheeler #conspiracy #quack #wingnut

Or third option, you're neither immune nor vaccinated, and are thus at risk. Because it's not like there was a huge disinformation campaign about the vaccine headed by assholes who value yelling at the waiter in person more than they do human life.

Various TERFs #crackpot #pratt #transphobia #conspiracy

Once again; “Yay, we've stripped ciswomen of their rights, which are also the rights we've been fighting for! Nothing stupid about that!”

I'm starting to think anti-LGBTQ+ people need a special uniform so you know what kind of person you're dealing with by sight alone, like how the Klan has pointy hoods, the Nazis had Hugo Boss, and Florida has wraparounds and cutoff jorts. Maybe something in a beige straightjacket and anti-biting mask?

Candace Owens #conspiracy #fundie #wingnut

“These dummy eggheads told us to do something so the bad thing would go away! Well, I didn't do any of what they told me to do, and the bad thing didn't go away, so the dummy eggheads are dumb and evil and the people chugging pet dewormer and seeing phantom spiders under their skin are right and awesome!”

Jesus fucking Christ, Candy, I weep for the trained chimps that have to dress you every morning.

Anonymous #fundie #conspiracy #crackpot #dunning-kruger #magick

I also have video evidence of Bigfoot. It's simply chilling - a Seattle man hit one with his car, and took it home, thinking it was dead. But it wasn't dead, just stunned, and what followed was a heartwarming series of shenanigans that led to an airborne dumpster ride, a Frenchman kicking Bigfoot in the nards and a Joe Cocker song.

Also, obligatory “SCP-1000 is exactly as intelligent as humans. Although they did cheat, using SCP-6783 to jumpstart evolution and build up their civilization.”

Liquid Rox #conspiracy #fundie #wingnut

So much self-fellating aggrandizement, it makes Rico Suave look like Dolly Parton.

I mean, did these people spend the last four years in an alternate universe where the Dotard wasn't a flabby, corrupt failure?

Ivo of Vega via Sharon Stewart #crackpot #ufo #magick #conspiracy

Laura Wood #conspiracy

So the government is both smart enough to fake horrors and tragedies on the regular, but dumb enough to let the FX guys from Troma Films do their photoshoots? Which is it, you glaring dolt, is the world run by the Masters of Evil, or Team Fucking Rocket?

Tory MP Nick Fletcher #sexist #conspiracy

God, can you imagine female versions of superior male characters? A girl version of Batman? Or lady Superman? A she-version of the Hulk? What gender-maddened wasteland would await the poor souls damned by wokeness to live in that hellscape world?

I swear, some people are so desperate for the scantest ghost of relevancy, they'll make up any old excuse to revive the moldering corpse of Mary Whitehouse.

Romana Didulo #conspiracy #psycho

@SpukiKitty02 #105209

Anytime I see her name, I think of Gene Ray, the poor schizophrenic who gave the world Time Cube. I'd say I hope she gets help, but here's the rub - she isn't schizophrenic, she's a fucking con artist stoking insane conspiracy nuts with her bullshit. She knows it's bullshit, she knows there's a non-zero chance she could inspire someone's death, and she just doesn't care. Why she hasn't been deported back to the Philippines for her crap is beyond me.

Prussian Society of America #racist #crackpot

Calls other groups liars, worships a group famous for their propaganda.

Melvin isn't just a horrid little fiend, he's also a fucking idiot, isn't he?

Three South Carolina state representatives #wingnut #racist #transphobia #homophobia

“We're gonna forbid you doing what nobody is doing, and mandate that you do what you're already doing! We look for non-problems to non-solve, therefore we am smrat!”

Dark Sage Mystic #quack

I guess polio just got bored and fucked off, then?

stopblockingmyhashtags #conspiracy #crackpot #fundie

leoandimartydicaprio2017 #crackpot #psycho

I'm not entirely certain, but from some context I get the idea that this person believes they are in a relationship with Leo diCaprio, which, yeah, would make them legitimately delusional. There's some hints at a schizoaffective disorder with a side of OCD, from how they're ranting that random disasters are being caused by…something something sacrament.

EDIT: Re-reading that…THAT, yeah, I think the sacrament she's talking about is the sacrament of marriage, and from that bit of…let's be kind and call it “logic,” one can deduce that she's miffy that Leo's getting cast opposite other women, which she sees as a violation of that sacrament, and because of that, God is - for some reason - killing completely random strangers in various tragedies. And Leo and Queen Kook here are apparently the reigning monarchs of all Italians, I guess. So yeah, legit mental illness. Wow, two of these today on the ‘Gram. Must be a special day over there.

bekkilyn #transphobia #sexist #conspiracy

@Malingspann #104903

[Jean Reno] This is from… Mathilda…[/Jean Reno]

Non-sequitur, but it's such a great movie.

The only people I've ever seen call pedophiles “MAPS” are the pedophiles themselves. They want everyone else to use that name because it takes a second to decipher and in that time, they can prepare a defense or baffle any opponents, but the truth is, they're fucking pedophiles. Cozy semantics and obfuscating language do little to hide their true selves. It's a weasely tactic to try and tie their bullshit to the LGBTQA+ factions, and ain't nobody going along with it. The LGBTQA+ side of things wants nothing to do with the fucking pedos, keep showing them the door, and as long as sanity prevails, that's how it will remain.
Maybe you should take some notes on how they deny the kiddy-fiddlers membership?

As a friendly reminder, here is a small list of known pedophiles. You might see some names you recognize.

Matt Gaetz
Vladislav Duggar (still not calling him Josh)
Lauren Boebert's shitbag husband
Donald John Trump, Senior
Known Trump dancing buddy and bedsheet-noose enthusiast, Jeffery Epstein
Procurer of children and other various sundries, Ghislaine Maxwell

BeforeItsNews #crackpot #conspiracy #wingnut

Man, give us all a warning and maybe time to grab a snack or hit the head before you do a 180 like that. The dude only just dodged a richly deserved murder rap and became the GOP's new Jesus, give him a week at least before you throw him under the bus. At least Der Drumpf would have shaken the kids hand before denying he ever knew him.

And if this shit were a show, I'd change the channel. Maybe find an old Simpsons rerun or something. At least those shenanigans, I'd find amusing.

bekkilyn #transphobia #conspiracy #wingnut

As a kid, I had neighbours who were bad with their spouses, an uncle who wasn't exactly a pleasant person, and due to my father's drinking and anger issues, I myself spent a night at a shelter with my mother and brothers, and…what the fuck is wrong with this dumb bitch? I mean, I know it's strawmanning because she has nothing else, but when you have nothing else, you stop trying. But this cunt? Nah, she's fucking special. She's not gonna let something like fucking reality get in her way of being just fucking horrid.

The Right refuses to feed kids, because it's too “expensive.”
The Right refuses to house kids, because it's too “expensive.”
The Right refuses to give kids healthcare, because “that's so-sha-lizz-um!”
The Right refuses to provide kids with safe schools and streets, because “muh guns!!”
The Right refuses to save the environment for kids, because “b-b-but our profit margins!”

Fuck the Right. Fuck them elbow deep with a fucking jackhammer. You want to criticize the Left for not getting anything done, fair enough. They need to grow a pair of fucking balls and stop trying to play by the rules when the other side isn't even playing at all, but at least they try. The GOP can't even be arsed to pretend they give a fuck.

@FBIISMAFIA #fundie #wingnut

@Timjer #104858

I guess that's the Book in the Bible where you go back and reflect on the time you wasted reading the Bible?

@Strobe_Lightly #transphobia #pratt

Supreme Leader of All Trans: “We've done it, ladies! We've infiltrated all feminine spaces and demolished women's rights! Huzzah!”

Second-In-Command: “Um…Ma’am…weren't those also our rights? Aren't we now just as screwed as the ciswomen?”

SLAT: “Nonsense! We'll just all go back to being real men, then we can marry the now-enslaved women and get free handmade (or is it "handmaid?”) sandwiches for life. Now where is that repenisolater, my dick isn't going to regrow itself.”

Candace Owens #conspiracy #crackpot #dunning-kruger #fundie #racist #wingnut

Actual Person: “Okay, yes, the Antebellum Democrats were assholes, but then the Southern Strategy…”

Candy Owens (with her fingers in her ears): “Lalalalala! I cannot hear you telling me the truth! My GOP paymasters told me that my income depends on me ignoring you and reality, and I have no other skills to fall back on, so I must repeat the lies they tell me to say!”

The Rest of the Human Race: “*Sigh!* Give it up, man. She's a lost cause, and we've got better things to do with our time, like see how many roofing nails we can hammer into our hands with a NERF dart.”

Blackpillapologist #crackpot #sexist #transphobia

@Niam2020 #104474

A) They would never do that; it's the closest they'll ever get to groping real tit. Unless they all get jobs milking cows, and what are the odds of that happening?

B) Incels hacking off their norks to spite themselves? Oh no wouldn't that simply be tragic? /s

flatearthandmore_ #conspiracy #crackpot #quack

Well someone's clearly been drinking lead paint. I mean, metal in general is dangerous to consume - it's why we don't sell mercury pills anymore, and it's why my snazzy mule mug has a nickel lining, so I don't absorb any copper when I drink from it. Science isn't fucking hard, people. We've known this shit for a few centuries, were the Qin Chinese trying to make us vulnerable to their terra cotta death rays?

Blackpillapologist #crackpot #sexist #transphobia

@Bastethotep #104438

I've seen “Hitler was a Jew;” I've seen “Hitler was gay;” I've even seen the rare, “Hitler was black,” from someone who was also black and was using Hitler's inclusion as a good thing. But yeah, “Hitler wears binders and stuffs metwurst down her pants” is a new flavour of crazy.

Cornfed #psycho

So I guess letting the kid be a kid and not foisting her off to some creeper who thinks he's Herbert Fucking Herbert wasn't an option?

@FBIISMAFIA #wingnut #racist #psycho

…the Patriots will kick your asses.

Well, yeah, they trounced the Falcons, didn't they? And I'm hardly a professional athlete, they'd end my pasty, arthritic, never-played-a-game-of-football-in-his-life-and-my-country-plays-it-weird-anyways ass.

Prussian Society of America #psycho

Melvin clearly wanks to the Uwe Boll Rampage movies.Probably with tweezers and a magnifying glass.

TheFoxAndTheFound #homophobia #pratt #racist #wingnut

“Optimism of the Nineties?” This is the decade that gave us the entire grunge movement, right? Depressing indie movies, Gen X, slackers, Columbine, that sort of thing? And all this idiot has to prop up his bigoted bullshit is some bleached, overly-sanitized Hollywood dreck about dogs? Was he in a fucking coma that whole time, or did he just have someone describe it to him and they left out all the, y'know, “reality” stuff?

Lt. Gen. Michael Flynn #fundie #wingnut

@SpukiKitty02 #104187

Holy tap-dancing Christ, that last picture, though. That's the face he makes when Putin tells him to come to Moscow with his kneepads and bib.

“How DARE Pontius Pelosi crucify our beloved First Amendment! Doesn't she know that's our job!”
- High Inquisitor Flynn, most likely.

Ray Comfort #fundie #pratt

@Spacewyrm #104075

Of course they were. if Nana-Man were to post a recipe for peppercorn gravy and biscuits, it would best be described as “disturbingly fucked up.” Are we talking “beat them until they cry tears of a broken will” fuckery, or more a DJS-style “make them flinch anytime someone tries to initiate innocent physical contact but they don't understand why” flavour of trauma?

@FBIISMAFIA #fundie #transphobia

All God's children can see clearly now!

Now that the rain is gone? Can they see all obstacles in their way? Gone are the dark clouds that had them blind? Is it gonna be a bright (bright) bright (bright) sunshiny day?

I'm not apologizing for that. It's fucking November, we could all use some Johnny Nash right about now and if these numpties are going to give me an opening, I'm going to take it. Enjoy the earworm, y’all.

Ray Comfort #fundie #pratt

Ben Garrison #ableist #conspiracy #quack #pratt

@stonedSalad #103801

…That is fundamentally stupid. These people are dumb right down to the molecular level. Nobody has perfect kids. Kids are whiny, selfish, loud, clumsy, irrational, weird and frankly, disgusting. It's the parents’ job to buff out the rough edges until you get a half-way presentable human being you can take out in public or leave alone for five fucking minutes without worrying if the smoke alarm has batteries in it.

Prussian Society of America #wingnut #sexist #wingnut #crackpot

“We want to force everyone to be as dull and grey and emotionally constipated as we are! In the glorious future we envision, the mindless drones shall wake, work in our misery mines until they drop or are deemed no longer valuable to the State, and then be incinerated to power our margarita blenders! All who oppose this are wrong and weak and evil and must be crushed beneath our mighty, bland and stagnant bootheel! All glory to the Blue Meanies!”

Whoops, I think I just violated the Reich's Anti-Sarcasm Ordinance. Think they'd come and pick me up if they knew where I was, or are they as sackless as Goebells?

Candace Owens #fundie #wingnut

Rittenhouse had no idea that the people he murdered had criminal records, and even if he had, that doesn't give him the right to kill them. If they were active criminals, they belonged in jail. If they had served their time, then he certainly had no right to kill them. He's a vigilante who went looking for trouble, found it and is now whining that his actions have consequences. Stop making monsters into heroes, you worthless bint.

Kevin Sorbo #fundie #wingnut

@Anon-e-moose #103793

I used to like his shows. Then he went nanners. Luckily, there is some catharsis to be found - if you can find it, the '90's Michael Chiklis cop drama The Commish had an early episode where Sorbs played a stalking douchebag. I find that episode endlessly satisfying.

Ben Garrison #ableist #conspiracy #quack #pratt

@Niam2020 #103755

When Ben Garrison finally fucks off to the choir invisible, there will be some talentless hack shill waiting in the wings to carry on his work; because as long as stupid people exist, there will be awful people there to stoke their stupidity and take their money. As an artist, I personally long for the day he gets his fingers caught in the car door.

And I swear, I will never understand why having a child with autism is somehow so much worse than having a child dead from an easily treatable and preventable disease. Like, sure, maybe an autistic child won't make eye contact, but neither will a dead one.